Damon Ashworth Psychology

Tag: wellness

  • Debunking Common Misconceptions About Sleep

    Debunking Common Misconceptions About Sleep

    Struggling with sleep? You’re not alone. But what if some of your thoughts about sleep were actually making things worse? The DBAS-16 (Dysfunctional Beliefs and Attitudes about Sleep) questionnaire identifies common, yet misguided, assumptions that can fuel hyper-arousal and insomnia.

    I’ll use my expertise in sleep and psychology to help challenge these beliefs. Let’s see if we can replace these unhelpful sleep beliefs with a healthier, science-backed mindset.

    1. “I need 8 hours of sleep to feel refreshed and function well during the day.”

    Challenge: While 7-9 hours of sleep per night is the general recommendation for adults, individual needs vary. A longitudinal study followed people’s sleep and health for several years. It found that people who slept 7 hours per night were healthier on average than those who slept 8-9 hours. Some people do need less sleep than the average, while others need more.

    Focusing too much on getting a fixed amount of sleep each night can create stress. This stress then makes achieving that sleep harder. It’s better to understand your individual sleep needs over time. Then aim to be in bed for not much more than that each night. By improving your sleep quality, regularity, and timing, you can also feel better the next day. You can achieve this even if you aren’t sleeping longer each night.

    2. “When I don’t get the proper amount of sleep on a given night, I need to catch up the next day by napping or the next night by sleeping longer.”

    Challenge: While occasional naps can be refreshing, try not to focus on getting extra sleep during the day. Long naps will reduce your sleep pressure for the next night. If you really have to nap, have one before 4 pm and for less than 30 minutes. This way, it won’t disrupt your sleep as much for the next night.

    Fixating on sleep during the day can keep insomnia going. This habit can also disrupt your natural sleep cycle. Try to engage in fulfilling activities instead. Consistently maintaining a sleep schedule is better than constantly trying to compensate for lost sleep. Your brain and body will then help you to feel more alert during the day and more sleepy at nighttime.

    3. “I am concerned that chronic insomnia may have serious consequences on my
    physical health.    “

    Challenge: While long-term sleep issues can have health effects, excessive worry about them can make sleep problems worse. Insufficient sleep can increase the risk of accidents and reduce productivity during the day. However, performance on tasks in people with insomnia is often better than we expect.

    Small improvements in sleep habits can mitigate risks and help restore healthier sleep patterns over time. Worrying less about the negative impacts of not sleeping can reduce arousal levels and lead to better sleep too.

    4. “I am worried that I may lose control over my abilities to sleep.”

    Challenge: Sleep is not something you control – it’s something you allow. As an involuntary process, the more you try to force sleep, the more elusive it can become.

    Instead, focus on doing things to wind down and relax at the end of the day. Focus on consistency and going to bed at similar times each night and waking up at similar times each morning. Try to only be in bed if you are sleepy and for not much longer than you need for sleep. If you do this at times that are ideal for your inner body clock, even better. Accept that you may have an occasional bad night of sleep. By following this approach, it is likely to lead to better and not worse sleep over time.

    5. “After a poor night’s sleep, I know it will interfere with my activities the next day.“

    Challenge: Feeling tired is natural. However, studies show that people with insomnia often perform better than they expect, even after a poor sleep.

    Worrying about fatigue can make it worse. Trust yourself to manage getting through the day. You can hopefully do what you need to do the next day. This is true even after imperfect sleep, and even if you feel tired or fatigued.

    6. “To be alert and function well during the day, I believe I would be better off taking a sleeping pill rather than having a poor night’s sleep.“

    Challenge: Sleeping pills can provide you short-term relief. Especially if you are going through a really hard time that is likely to last for less than two weeks.

    However, sleeping pills do not address the root causes of chronic insomnia. Additionally, they can lead to dependence over time. Therefore, they are not recommended to be taken regularly for more than 2-4 weeks.

    Behavioral strategies, such as Cognitive Behavioral Therapy for Insomnia (CBT-I), are more effective than sleeping pills. They don’t result in rebound insomnia once the treatment finishes, and they improve sleep in the long term. Prioritizing good sleep habits over medication can lead to more sustainable, restorative sleep.

    7. “When I feel irritable, depressed, or anxious during the day, it is mostly because I did not sleep well the night before.“

    Challenge: While poor sleep can affect mood, emotions are influenced by multiple factors, including stress, lifestyle, and thought patterns. Blaming all negative emotions on sleep can lead to much more anxiety about sleep.

    Instead, if you aren’t feeling great, try engaging in mood-boosting activities. Spend time with people that you like. Exercise and get out into nature. Do something creative or fun. Seek excitement, awe, or joy. Write down things that you feel grateful for. Learn stress management and mindfulness skills. All of these strategies can help improve emotional well-being, even after a rough night of sleep.

    8. “When I sleep poorly one night, I know it will disturb my sleep schedule for the
    whole week.    “

    Challenge: One bad night does not define your entire sleep pattern. If you sleep poorly on one night, your sleep pressure will be a lot higher for the next night. Your brain will then try to make it easier for you to sleep deeply and well. This is to help compensate for the poor night of sleep the night before. If you can keep your stress and worry in check, you are likely to sleep better after a poor night.

    9. “Without an adequate night’s sleep, I can hardly function the next day.“

    Challenge: While sleep is important, the body is resilient. Many people still function well after a poor night of sleep. Things will feel like they require more effort, and you probably won’t feel as motivated to do things. You might even crave more junk food. However, performance studies show that people with insomnia’s functioning is better than they think it will be.

    Energy levels fluctuate naturally throughout the day, and movement, hydration, and good nutrition can help maintain alertness. Try to focus on what you can do during the day to help you to function well. Even when you feel unmotivated.

    10. “I can’t ever predict whether I’ll have a good or poor night’s sleep.“

    Challenge: Some variation in sleep is normal. But this doesn’t mean that sleep is completely unpredictable.

    You can improve the predictability of your sleep by maintaining a consistent bedtime routine. Sleep at the right times for you. Wind down and relax before bedtime, and wait until you feel sleepy before going to bed.

    11. “I have little ability to manage the negative consequences of disturbed sleep.“

    Challenge: You have more resilience than you think. Focus on what feels achievable during the day after a poor night of sleep. If your capacity feels like a 5/10, get through as many of the easier tasks on your to-do-list as possible.

    By doing what you can, looking after yourself and managing your stress well, it is possible to navigate occasional poor sleep. It also increases your chances of getting things back on track with your sleep going forward.

    12. “When I feel tired, have no energy, or just seem not to function well during the
    day, it is generally because I did not sleep well the night before.    “

    Challenge: Our daytime performance and energy levels naturally fluctuate during the day. For most people, it is very common to have a post-lunch dip. Some countries even take siestas during this time rather than trying to push through or ignore how they are feeling. Try not to attribute everything to how you slept the night before.

    Instead, focus on what you can do in the moment. Take a break. Get some fresh air. Have a drink of water or a healthy snack. Engage in an enjoyable or creative activity. Try to shift the focus away from your sleep and see if it reduces insomnia’s control on your life.

    13. “I believe insomnia is essentially the result of a chemical imbalance.“

    Challenge: Brain chemistry plays a role in sleep. However, insomnia is often driven by behavioral, cognitive, and emotional factors. It is not merely caused by a simple chemical imbalance. By saying it is an imbalance, you imply it is out of your control. You indicate there is nothing you can do.

    The science does not support this. CBT-I and other non-medication approaches can be highly effective in addressing the underlying causes of insomnia and improving your sleep. Focus on what you can do.

    14. “I feel insomnia is ruining my ability to enjoy life and prevents me from doing
    what I want.    “

    Challenge: Insomnia can be frustrating, but it doesn’t have to define your life. Many people with sleep issues still find joy in their days. Shifting focus away from sleep struggles can improve overall well-being and even sleep itself.

    15. “Medication is probably the only solution to sleeplessness.“

    Challenge: While medication can help in certain cases, non-medication approaches—especially CBT-I — are often more effective for long-term sleep improvement. Stimulus control, sleep restriction, progressive muscle relaxation and paradoxical intention can also make a significant difference. They are all empirically supported interventions for insomnia.

    16. “I avoid or cancel obligations (social, family) after a poor night’s sleep.“

    Challenge: Avoiding activities due to poor sleep can reinforce sleep-related fears. If you say that you can’t function without perfect sleep, it will fuel your anxiety. By engaging in your normal activities, even when you are tired, it can help you to re-frame your sleep-related fears.

    So the next time you don’t sleep well, try not to cancel your plans the next day. Go out and do it anyway, and see how it goes. Then afterwards, ask yourself: 1. how did it go? 2. was it as bad as I thought it would be? and 3. what does this mean for a similar situation next time?

    Final Thoughts

    Many of our beliefs about sleep are shaped by misinformation, anxiety, and unrealistic expectations. By challenging these unhelpful attitudes, you can reduce stress around sleep and improve your overall sleep quality.

    If you struggle with persistent sleep issues, consider seeking out a psychologist for CBT-I. It is considered the gold standard or first line treatment for breaking the cycle of insomnia.

    What do you think?

    Do you strongly agree with any of these common unhelpful beliefs about sleep? Let me know in the comments!

  • How to Watch the 2024 Paris Olympics Live from Abroad Without Turning Into a Sleep-Deprived Zombie!

    How to Watch the 2024 Paris Olympics Live from Abroad Without Turning Into a Sleep-Deprived Zombie!

    The 2024 Paris Olympics have begun. For sports lovers and patriotic people worldwide, it can involve lots of time glued to the couch checking out the live action.

    For people living overseas like myself, it can also mean some serious sleep disruption for the next 16 days. Especially if you prefer to watch an event live when it is happening, rather than having to record the events overnight and then watch the replay when it most suits you.

    I don’t know about you, but there can be something special about watching an event live. As much as I try to tell myself that it is similar, watching a replay of an NBA or AFL game when the result is already out there and only one click away doesn’t feel quite the same.

    But what about the eight hour time difference between Melbourne and Paris? Or the nine hour time difference between Paris and Los Angeles and San Francisco? It might come down to a preference to experience the event live but sacrifice some sleep, or to watch the replay and potentially having the results spoiled by well meaning friends or family. Or even social media or the news.

    The easiest and probably best option for people that want to preserve their sleep at night and energy levels during the day is to record the events you want to see or use streaming services that allow you to watch the replays at times that best suit you.

    For certain events and certain people, that just might not do. I know that there were a few of my friends that made sure that they were awake to support the Matildas at 3am this morning. Some of them that already work in hospitality until fairly late just stayed up until the game and slept afterwards. For others that work the standard 9am to 5pm, they would have woken up early and would already be feeling pretty tired in their first few hours of work.

    Strategies for Managing Sleep During the Olympics

    1. Know Your Body Clock:

    • Morning People (“Larks”): Try to wake up early to watch events. Have a short nap of under 30 minutes during the day if needed. Go to bed a bit earlier than usual the following night if you are feeling sleepy, but then get up at your usual time the day after.
    • Evening People (“Night Owls”): Stay up to watch events and sleep in a bit later (but not too late) if possible. Have a short nap of under 30 minutes during the day if needed. Go to bed at your usual time the night after.

    2. Minimize Disruption:

    • If you stay up later than usual, limit your sleep-in to a maximum of 30 minutes later per extra hour that you have been awake for to avoid disrupting your sleep cycle too much. For example, if you normally sleep from midnight to 8am, but are awake until 4am, try to only sleep in until 10am.
    • If you wake up earlier than usual, try to go to bed a maximum of 30 minutes earlier for each hour of less sleep you have had the next night to maintain your regular sleep routine. For example, if you normally sleep from 10pm until 6am, but then wake up at 4am, try to sleep the next night between 9pm and 6am (as long as you feel sleepy around 9pm).

    3. Plan for Recovery:

    • After a late night or early morning, expect to feel more tired and possibly irritable the next day. Get back into your regular sleep schedule as quickly as possible to help recover and get back on track as soon as possible.
    • Avoid staying up all night multiple times, as it can have a compounded negative effect on your sleep and overall health.

    4. Prioritise Safety:

    • If you’re too tired to drive, consider using public transport rather than driving.
    • If you need to perform tasks that could be risky or unsafe or require lots of concentration, consider taking a day off work if possible.

    Four Key Aspects of a Good Night’s Sleep

    Dr Matthew Walker, a sleep scientist and author of the mega selling book, ‘Why We Sleep’, mentioned in a podcast that I was listening to recently the four things that he thinks are important for sleep over time. He called this “QQRT”.

    Q: Ideally, we want a certain quantity of sleep. For most adults, this is likely to be somewhere between 6 and 9 hours a night. 7 hours a night is often found to be the healthiest in longitudinal studies, but sleep needs vary a bit from person to person, so see what tends to make you feel the way that you would like to during the day and aim for that. Remember that quantity is only one of the four elements of a good night’s sleep, so doing the other three things right can help people to feel better the next day even if they obtain less sleep than they would like to.

    Q: We want to do things to improve our sleep quality. For me, that is minimising my alcohol intake, doing things to wind down and relax before sleep, not eating too large a meal too close to bedtime, waiting until I feel sleepy before going to bed, and only being in bed for a maximum 8.5 hours each night.

    R: We want to have good regularity in when we sleep from night to night. For me, that means going to bed between 11 to 11:30pm most nights and waking up between 7 and 7:30am seven days a week. If someone’s sleep schedule has lots of variability in it across the week, it will be much harder for their brain to help them to sleep when they want to at night, and help them to be alert and function well when they would like to during the day. Social jetlag is a real phenomenon, and can happen if someone’s weekend sleep schedule varies a lot from their weekday sleep schedule.

    T: Finally, we want to be sleeping at the right time for ourselves and our internal body clock. A “lark” might sleep best between 9pm and 5am. An “owl” might sleep best between 1am and 9am. Think about what 8 hour window in a 24-hour cycle is likely to be when your body and brain most want you to sleep, and try to sleep and wake up around those times. For me, it is between 11:15pm and 7:15am. If you can do this, you will find it a lot easier over time to feel sleepy and sleep well in bed, and feel alert and perform well during the day.

    Conclusion

    Ultimately, the key is balance. If watching live events is a priority, be mindful of how it affects your sleep and adjust your routine to mitigate any negative impact. If the sleep disruption outweighs the enjoyment, consider replays and avoid unnecessary fatigue. Enjoy the Olympics and make sure to take care of your well-being in the process!

    If you’d like to hear a radio segment that I was a part of on ABC discussing this topic, here is the link.

    Dr Damon Ashworth

    Clinical Psychologist

  • Are You Looking After Both of Your Selves?

    Are You Looking After Both of Your Selves?

    Imagine that you could go on a holiday to anywhere that you want to go in the world. However, you couldn’t take any pictures or tell anyone what you got up to while you were away or afterwards?

    Furthermore, you can only experience the holiday while away and feel all the emotions you do in the present. Once the holiday is over, you will have no memory of where you went or what it was like.

    Where would you go, and what would you do?

    Next, imagine that the trip has no limitations. It is just like any other holiday that you have been on, except you have no budget. So you can take as many photos and videos as your heart desires and look back on these as much as you want.

    You can tell whoever you want to, both during the trip and for the rest of your life afterwards. You can also think back and reminisce about the trip and your memories of it as much as you would like to in the future.

    Where would you go, and what would you do?

    Would your dream holiday be the same in the first situation as it is in the second scenario? If so, do you know why? If not, why?

    For the first example, I want something fun, easy, pleasurable and relaxing. I want a resort with a pool and a spa, tasty food, 27-degree sunny weather, a cozy bed and a comfortable recliner. The resort would have a nice view, maybe of the ocean, or the mountainside. If other people came, they would have to be okay relaxing and occasionally chatting or playing a game. All cleaning and washing and any chores would all be done for me. And I could enjoy each moment as much as possible without any sign of difficulty or personal strain.

    For the second example, now a hike to the Himalayas or Macchu Picchu seems more appealing. More movement, more effort, some beautiful scenery and remarkable experiences. Having a few celebrities who come on the trek is suddenly more enticing because now I can take some snaps and share this with friends or on my social media. Alongside all of the effort that I put into the trip and the natural beauty of the place. Flying first class may even be worth it if I take some videos and photos to show off to everyone else.

    Experiential vs Narrative Self

    If I’m not going to remember the holiday or talk to others about how it was, why would I bother splashing out on heaps of money or putting in a lot of effort or even hanging out with celebrities? Comfort, ease, and enjoyment become the highest priorities. The things that make for a good story, memory or Instagram post become less so.

    This is one of the biggest dilemmas that we all have inside of us.

    We have the part of ourselves that wants to enjoy the moment as much as possible. This is the experiential self. It usually wants to do an activity that requires the least effort and is enjoyable in the short term. This is often why people procrastinate, play video games, lie on the couch, watch TV or a movie, eat junk food, etc. To this part of ourselves, it doesn’t matter if the activity is beneficial to us in the long run as long as it feels good at the moment.

    EXPERIENTIAL SELF

    Want to doHave to doWant to doHave to do
    Enjoy in the short-termYESYESNONO
    Find beneficial in the long-run????

    But we also have the part of ourselves that cares about the stories we tell about our lives to ourselves and others. This is the narrative self. It wants to do activities that are challenging, meaningful and worthwhile in the long run. Doing housework, working hard, eating healthily, exercising consistently, and child-rearing may not always be fun from moment to moment. However, they help us become what we want to tell ourselves and others that we are over time. House proud, successful, fit, healthy, and a good parent. To this part of ourselves, it cares much less about how enjoyable something is in the moment as long as it helps us tell the story about who we are and what we have done.

    NARRATIVE SELF

    Want to doHave to doWant to doHave to do
    Enjoy in the short-term????
    Find beneficial in the long-runYESYESNONO

    Because these two parts of ourselves seem so different, it can be quite hard to keep them both happy.

    Several clients I have seen prioritise the experiential self over the narrative self. They spend most of their day doing enjoyable things at the expense of anything perceived as challenging or uncomfortable. Their experiential self is satisfied, but their narrative self is not. Over time, they are likely to become more and more dissatisfied with where they are in their lives or the story they tell.

    The opposite can also happen but is seen less frequently. These individuals work all the time, never eat any junk food, or let themselves relax and have fun. Instead, they clean all the time, put the kids first nonstop, exercise excessively, and never give themselves a break. As a result, their narrative self can view themselves positively and share this with others, but their experiential self is miserable.

    Want to do vs Have to do

    To see if you could obtain a better balance in your life, ask yourself some of the following questions:

    • What are the things that you have to do in this life?
    • Which of these chores/responsibilities do you enjoy doing in the short term while you are doing them?
    • Which of these chores/responsibilities can you look back at once they are finished and feel glad that you have completed them?
    • Do any of these chores/responsibilities tick both boxes and are fun at the moment and consistent with who you want to be in the long run? Can you do more of these and less of other chores and responsibilities that don’t tick these boxes?
    • Are there any chores/responsibilities that are not enjoyable and don’t help you feel like you are the person you want to be in the long run? In other words, is there anything that you only do because you worry about what others would think if you don’t do them? Can you do less of these chores and responsibilities in your life by not doing them as much? Could you pay someone else to do them or negotiate with someone you live with to do these tasks more in exchange for you doing more of other chores and responsibilities that you enjoy and maybe they don’t?
    • What are the things that you want to do in your life?
    • Which of these activities do you also enjoy doing while you are doing them? Are you doing these things as often as you would like to? Or are you doing them too much for what feels like a good balance? Or too little?
    • Which of these activities do you not enjoy while doing them, but you can look back at them once they are finished and feel glad that you have done them? Are you doing these things in your life as often as you would like to?
    • Which of these activities do you find both enjoyable in the moment and consistent with the person you would like to be in the long run? Do you schedule enough time in your life for these sweet-spot activities?

    How balanced does your life feel between your want-to-dos and your have-to-dos?

    If your have-to-do responsibilities far outweigh your want-to-do activities, you are unlikely to be as happy and as satisfied with your life as you would like to be.

    This is likely to be the same if you are doing many things only because you worry about what others would think if you didn’t do them. For example, if you hate cleaning and ironing and can afford to pay someone to do these tasks for you weekly so that you don’t have to worry about them, what difference could that make to how you feel? Furthermore, what could you do that you might find more rewarding with the newfound time, energy and mental space you would have?

    If you are lucky enough to have at least one sweet spot activity, you will find these tasks the easiest to put your energy into and get better at over time.

    Sometimes people call these activities their passions, and they will be the easiest activities for you to persevere at for a long time. This can be how I feel editing movies or playing sport, or snow-skiing. I enjoy myself, am no longer in my head, and am fully immersed in the task. Then, before I know it, a long time has passed, and it is lunchtime or the end of the day.

    I’m sure that you have heard the famous quote: “Find something you love to do, and you’ll never have to work a day in your life.” If anything helps you feel this way or get into a state of flow regularly, you won’t regret making it a priority in your life.

    Dr Damon Ashworth

    Clinical Psychology