Tag: success

  • The Top Ten Rated Non-Fiction Books for Personal Growth and Understanding

    The Top Ten Rated Non-Fiction Books for Personal Growth and Understanding

    These ten exceptional books represent some of the highest-rated and potentially transformative reads available today. Each offers profound insights into different aspects of human experience—from addiction and trauma to sleep science and longevity.

    For the earlier books in the countdown: 100-91, 90-81, 80-71, 70-61, 60-51, 50-41, 40-31, 30-21, 20-11.

    Here’s your final guide to non-fiction books that have the power to genuinely change how you think and live…

    10. Humankind: A Hopeful History by Rutger Bregman

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.32/5

    Bregman challenges cynical assumptions about human nature, arguing that people are fundamentally wired for cooperation and kindness. He presents evidence that trust-based societies outperform those built on fear and control. Our pessimistic view of humanity often becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.

    What makes it special: Bregman combines historical research with psychological studies to debunk myths about human selfishness. His optimistic yet evidence-based perspective offers a refreshing alternative to cynical worldviews while acknowledging real challenges.

    Perfect for:

    • Readers interested in psychology, sociology, and history
    • Optimists and skeptics seeking a balanced view of humanity
    • Policymakers, educators, and activists aiming for positive social change.

    Key takeaway: Humans are naturally inclined toward cooperation and empathy. Designing institutions that assume the best in people rather than the worst creates better outcomes for everyone.

    9. Atomic Habits: An Easy & Proven Way to Build Good Habits and Break Bad Ones by James Clear

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.33/5

    Clear’s systematic approach to habit formation focuses on creating systems rather than setting goals. His four laws of behavior change provide a practical framework. These laws are to make it obvious, attractive, easy, and satisfying. They help in building good habits through small, incremental changes.

    What makes it special: Clear distills habit science into actionable strategies that anyone can implement. His emphasis on identity change (“becoming the type of person who…”) rather than just behavioral change creates lasting transformation.

    Perfect for:

    • Anyone wanting to build better habits and break bad ones,
    • People interested in personal development and productivity,
    • Coaches, therapists, and educators teaching behavioural change.

    Key takeaway: Sustainable change comes through systems, not goals. Focus on becoming the type of person who naturally embodies the habits you want. Make small changes that compound over time.

    8. The Anxious Generation: How the Great Rewiring of Childhood Caused an Epidemic of Mental Illness by Jonathan Haidt

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.35/5

    Haidt examines the surge in anxiety and depression among young people. He connects it to social media use, overprotection, and cultural changes that have rewired childhood. He explores how anxiety affects political engagement, free speech, and social dynamics while offering hope for creating more resilient communities.

    What makes it special: Haidt combines social psychology research with cultural analysis. He explains one of the most pressing issues of our time. His balanced approach acknowledges real mental health struggles while examining how anxiety can limit growth and open dialogue.

    Perfect for:

    • Parents, educators, and mental health professionals working with young people
    • Anyone concerned about rising anxiety rates
    • Readers interested in how technology and culture shape mental health.

    Key takeaway: Rising anxiety among youth stems from environmental and cultural changes, not inherent weakness. Building resilience requires balancing protection with appropriate challenges that foster growth.

    7. The Laws of Human Nature by Robert Greene

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.35/5

    Greene’s comprehensive guide to understanding human behavior reveals the unconscious forces that drive our actions. From the law of irrationality to the law of death denial, he provides a framework for reading people. He helps in understanding motivations and navigating complex social dynamics with greater wisdom.

    What makes it special: Greene synthesises insights from history, psychology, and philosophy. These insights transform into practical laws that apply across cultures and contexts. His approach combines strategic thinking with psychological insight, offering tools for both self-understanding and social effectiveness.

    Perfect for:

    • Leaders, strategists, and professionals wanting deeper insight into human nature
    • Those interested in psychology, history, and personal development
    • Anyone seeking greater self-awareness and social influence.

    Key takeaway: Understanding the hidden laws that govern human behaviour is crucial. This includes recognising our own irrationality, defensiveness, and narcissism. Doing so allows us to navigate relationships with greater wisdom. It also helps us achieve goals more effectively.

    6. Outlive: The Science of Art & Longevity by Peter Attia and Bill Gifford

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.35/5

    Attia presents a revolutionary approach to medicine focused on prevention rather than treatment. His “Medicine 3.0” framework targets the “Four Horsemen” of preventable death decades before they manifest. It emphasizes exercise as the ultimate longevity drug. The framework also advocates for personalized approaches to nutrition and mental health.

    What makes it special: Attia combines his experience as a surgeon with cutting-edge longevity research. He also shares personal vulnerability about his own emotional struggles. The book offers a guide for not just living longer, but maintaining quality of life into old age.

    Perfect for:

    • Anyone serious about preventative health and longevity
    • Health professionals and performance-optimisers
    • People in midlife looking to maximise their health-span.

    Key takeaway: True longevity requires proactive health management decades before disease appears. Exercise, good nutrition, sleeping well, emotional well-being, and early detection are the cornerstone strategies.

    5. Why We Sleep: Unlocking the Power of Sleep and Dreams by Matthew Walker

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.38/5

    Walker’s comprehensive examination of sleep reveals it as the foundation of physical and mental health. The book explores how sleep affects every system in the body. It ranges from memory consolidation to immune function. The book also provides practical guidance for optimising this critical third of our lives.

    What makes it special: Although the book has a really high goodreads rating, I personally don’t like it much. Nor would I recommend it to people who are already worried about sleep or those with insomnia. Walker tries to say that we don’t prioritise sleep enough, and it is killing us. However, this can be debated. Look up issues with Why We Sleep if you want to find out more. It does provide some actionable solutions for people to implement if they want to improve their sleep.

    Perfect for:

    • For those who aren’t prioritising sleep enough.
    • Anyone serious about optimising their health and performance
    • Healthcare professionals seeking to understand sleep’s role in overall wellness.

    Key takeaway: Sleep isn’t a luxury or sign of laziness. It is one of the most powerful tool we have for physical health. It also aids mental clarity and emotional resilience.

    4. Unmasking Autism: Discovering the New Faces of Neurodiversity by Devon Price

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.38/5

    Price’s groundbreaking work reveals how many autistic people hide their authentic selves to survive in a neurotypical world. This is especially true for women, BIPOC, and LGBTIQ+ individuals. The book explores the exhausting cost of “masking” and provides a pathway for reclaiming authentic identity and finding supportive communities.

    What makes it special: Price writes both as a researcher and as a late-diagnosed autistic person. This combination brings together academic rigour and lived experience. The book challenges stereotypes about autism while providing practical guidance for those discovering their neurodivergent identity.

    Perfect for:

    • Late-diagnosed or self-diagnosed autistic adults
    • Women and non-binary people who suspect they’re neurodivergent,
    • BIPOC autistic individuals
    • Therapists and mental health professionals
    • Anyone interested in neurodiversity and identity work.

    Key takeaway: Masking autistic traits may help survival but comes at enormous personal cost. Unmasking—gradually revealing your authentic self—is essential for mental health and genuine connection.

    3. Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents: How to Heal from Distant, Rejecting or Self-Involved Parents by Lindsay C. Gibson

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.38/5

    Gibson’s compassionate guide helps adults understand how growing up with emotionally immature parents affects their relationships and self-worth. She provides practical tools for healing from invalidating childhood experiences and building healthier adult relationships through boundary-setting and self re-parenting.

    What makes it special: Gibson combines clinical expertise with deep empathy for those who grew up feeling unseen or invalidated. Her framework for understanding different types of emotionally immature parents helps readers make sense of confusing childhood experiences.

    Perfect for:

    • Adults who grew up feeling unseen, unsupported, or invalidated
    • People who struggle in close relationships
    • Therapists and mental health professionals
    • Anyone healing from narcissistic, passive-aggressive, or emotionally absent parenting.

    Key takeaway: You can heal from an emotionally invalidating childhood. Recognise it wasn’t your fault. Set healthy boundaries with immature parents. Learn to re-parent yourself with the compassion you deserved as a child.

    2. When Breath Becomes Air by Paul Kalanithi

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.41/5

    This profound memoir follows neurosurgeon Paul Kalanithi as he transitions from doctor to terminal cancer patient. Written in the space between life and death, it explores questions of identity, purpose, and meaning when facing mortality. His reflections on becoming a father while dying create a powerful meditation on legacy and love.

    What makes it special: Kalanithi’s background in literature gives him a unique perspective. His medical knowledge allows him to explore the scientific aspects of mortality. He also delves into the deeply human aspects. Written with extraordinary grace while facing death, it offers wisdom about living fully in the face of uncertainty.

    Perfect for:

    • People facing illness or loss
    • Healthcare professionals and medical students
    • Readers of memoir and literary nonfiction
    • Anyone in a major life transition or seeking deeper meaning.

    Key takeaway: Life’s fragility gives it meaning. We can’t control death, but we can choose how we live—with purpose, connection, and courage until the very end.

    1. In The Realm of Hungry Ghosts: Close Encounters with Addiction by Gabor Mate

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.49/5

    Maté’s compassionate exploration of addiction reveals it as a response to trauma and emotional pain rather than a moral failing. Drawing from his work with severely addicted individuals in Vancouver’s Downtown Eastside, he shows how addiction hijacks the brain. He emphasizes that healing requires addressing underlying trauma, not just symptoms.

    What makes it special: Maté combines neuroscience, personal stories, and Buddhist philosophy to create a deeply humanizing portrait of addiction. His background as both a physician and a person who understands compulsive behavior personally. This combination brings unique credibility and compassion to the topic.

    Perfect for:

    • People struggling with addiction or in recovery
    • Families and loved ones of addicted individuals
    • Healthcare professionals and counsellors
    • Anyone interested in trauma, mental health, or neuroscience.

    Key takeaway: Addiction is not a choice or character flaw. It is a response to pain and trauma. This issue requires compassionate treatment. The treatment should address root causes, not just behavioural symptoms.

    The Universal Themes

    These top-rated books share several profound insights about the human experience:

    • Trauma shapes behaviour: Whether through addiction, masking, or relationship patterns, unprocessed pain influences how we navigate the world.
    • Prevention beats treatment: Addressing root causes early, from sleep to health to emotional well-being, is more effective. This approach is better than managing symptoms later.
    • Authenticity requires courage: Whether unmasking autism or embracing vulnerability, being genuine in a conformist world takes strength.
    • Connection heals: Isolation worsens most human problems.Genuine relationships provide the foundation for growth and recovery.
    • Small changes compound: Whether building habits or improving health, consistent small actions create dramatic long-term results.

    Which of these themes resonates most strongly with your current life situation? Often the book that feels most challenging to read is exactly the one we need most.

    Dr Damon Ashworth

    Clinical Psychologist

  • Are You Playing the Right Games in Your Life?

    Are You Playing the Right Games in Your Life?

    A fascinating book that I read recently was The Status Game by Will Storr. I have enjoyed reading a few of his prior books too, including Selfie and The Science of Storytelling.

    In it, Storr says that it is impossible to not be part of some hierarchies. In other words, we can’t go through life without having a sense that we are competing against other people in some areas of our lives.

    This is what he means by games. Not just basketball, monopoly, or poker. A game is anything where there is a set of rules about how things should be. Based on this, it is possible to get a sense of if you are doing well, winning, or losing.

    “The fastest person on the planet” is a game that has been played better by Usain Bolt than anyone else ever. Michael Phelps is at the top of the “best swimmer of all-time” hierarchy. Whilst I had some moments when I was younger when I did Little Athletics and swam competitively, I’m not trying to play either of these games these days. Therefore, I don’t really care about where I am in either of these hierarchies.

    Joe Rogan has been at the top of the “most listened to podcast” hierarchy for a while now with his Joe Rogan Experience. I wouldn’t mind having a few more listeners and some of the financial security that comes along with it, but being at the top of that game is really not what I’m aiming at either.

    I podcast because I like to have a creative outlet and share some of my insights with people who may be interested. It’s also fun to be sharing the project with one of my closest mates who I don’t get to see as often as I would like to anymore. Therefore, as long as I am making and putting out a podcast episode once a month, I’m happy with the game I am playing.

    Bernard Arnault is currently winning the game of the “richest person in the world” with $208.7 billion. Being high up on that hierarchy sure wouldn’t be important to Will MacAskill, who is an effective altruist and author of the excellent 2015 book Doing Good Better. He committed a while back to donating to charity all money that he makes every year beyond £24,000. Being the richest person in the world would be even less important to a Monk that has given away all of his earthly possessions and is spending his life in a monastery.

    When it comes to money for me, all I am aiming for is a healthy and happy life. If the money I am making and saving allows me to do that, I feel like I am winning. Especially if I get to live in a sustainable way where I am not too stressed, helping some people in my work and connecting with the people that are most important to me outside of it.

    I might not have as many fancy things as Kim Kardashian, or get to travel into space like Jeff Bezos, but I am also glad that I am not like either of them in these ways and many others too. Because I am not competing against them for things or money, we are not playing the same games, I am not lower in the hierarchy of those games, and I do not have to feel worse about myself.

    It is only when I am not being the person that I want to be, and I can see that others are living the life that I want better than I am that I experience feeling lower in the hierarchy and worse off. The moment I can make the necessary changes to start living my life consistently with my core values, the more I am playing the games that are really important to me, the better I am doing and the more satisfied I am likely to feel.

    At the end of The Status Game, Storr shares what he says are the core rules of status games to keep in mind so that you can improve your life and be protected from potential traps and danger. Sometimes certain dreams can be persuasive, but it doesn’t mean that striving toward something will necessarily give you what you need. I’d like to summarise these for you here.

    Photo by Marc on Pexels.com

    Seven Rules of the Status Game

    Rule 1: Practice warmth, sincerity, and competence

    These three components are essential if you want to optimally present yourself to others and successfully play a status game. If another person is trying to gauge what type of person you are, they are most likely to assess you to see if you are a kind person, if you are genuine, and if you know what you are talking about and are good at what you do.

    If you have competence, sincerity, and warmth in whatever it is that is important to you, others will know that you will not try to dominate them, that you will treat them fairly, and that you will probably be able to help them.

    Rule 2: Make small moments of prestige, not dominance.

    Wherever you can, try to create win-win situations, where you are trying to benefit both yourself and the other person in an interaction. If you are trying to win by making the other person lose or be worse off, it can lead to a worse reputation for who you are over time.

    Try to be respectful to others, even if you disagree about something. Be gracious and thankful for the efforts that they have put in. You might not always get what you want if you conduct yourself in this way. However, both parties will leave the situation feeling better about who you are as a person, including yourself. If you take care of developing your character in the ways you would like, your reputation is likely to speak for itself over time.

    Rule 3: Play a hierarchy of games and resist tyranny.

    Whichever game you are playing, try to see if you can notice how status is awarded. If higher-status people are the most obedient ones, believe more strongly in the dogma, and are most concerned with defeating the enemies or non-believers, you may be caught up in tyranny. Tyrannies are virtue dominance games.

    To best protect yourself from becoming too caught up in tyranny, try to play a wide diversity of games and have different aspects to your identity.

    If someone’s identity is entirely tied up with being a good Democrat or a good Republican, it can be hard to go against anything that their party stands for. However, if your political beliefs are only a small part of who you are, it may be a lot easier to disagree with the party that you usually support on a particular topic.

    Storr says that life is easier when we organize it as a hierarchy of games. By choosing what is most important to you, and then putting effort into these different things in a proportional way, you are likely to obtain a lot of meaning in your life.

    Rule 4: Reduce your moral sphere.

    Where you can, try not to spend too much time judging other people for what they do. Instead, turn your focus to your own life and behaviors, and see if you are being the person that you want to be. It is so much easier to judge other people for falling short than putting in the consistent effort to improve yourself in the ways that you would like to.

    If someone else is playing a game that doesn’t matter to you, why do you need to judge them? They might have different values from you and are okay with the choices they are making. Isn’t it more important to find out if you are living consistently with your values?

    Rule 5: Foster a trade-off mindset.

    One of the quickest ways to poison the empathy we have towards someone or something is to become moralistic about it. The truth of most matters is often more complex than you realise if you only think about it as right or wrong.

    If you can, try not to view the world in terms of heroes and villains, but different groups negotiating trade-offs. Most people are simply wanting what they perceive is the best for themselves, their family, or their group.

    Pain is pain, regardless of who it is happening to. If you perceive someone as an enemy, try to understand the pain that they are in. Also, see if you can see the games that they are playing in an attempt of gaining status and feeling less pain.

    If you can understand why someone is doing something, even if you would never want to play their game or see it as valid, it may be easier to remain compassionate or empathetic towards them. We need to all fight the bigotry that exists on both sides, and see if it is possible to reduce pain and improve the quality of life for all.

    Rule 6: Be different.

    It’s not easy to play a status game, nor is it often rewarding. If there can only be one winner, it can make everyone else feel worse off. Especially if you’re living in a more individualistic culture. If you live in a more collectivist culture, if anyone in your group has success, it can be possible to feel some of that success yourself too.

    There is another way towards feeling good about yourself rather than continuing to try to be perfect or better than everyone else at something. That is through having the courage and determination to live by your own values and do your own thing, regardless of what everyone else says is important.

    It may be tough to not conform if you feel a lot of external pressure to do what everyone else is doing. However, minor acts of non-conformity that do not violate the core standards of the group can attract attention rather than make you an outcast. As long as you remain helpful and useful to the group at times, you can rise in your status rather than being ostracised.

    Being original also makes it very difficult for others to compete with you. Keep trying to be yourself rather than trying to be perfect. No one else is ever going to be as good at being you as you are, no matter how hard they try.

    Rule 7: Never forget your dreaming.

    At the end of the day, most things are not as important as people think when they are caught up in a status game. People strive for status because they want to feel like their life is essential and really means something to others and the fate of the world.

    But if you look at the 8 billion people on the planet, there may not be too many people that are remembered 450 years later like Shakespeare, or over 200 years later like George Washington. This doesn’t mean that your life isn’t important to some people.

    Your life probably already means a lot to your inner circle, including your closest family, friends, and co-workers. I guess a big question then is what is more important to you? Being the person that you would like to be towards your parents, partner, children, best friends, and colleagues? Or worrying about what a random person in your town, the other side of the world, or in a few hundred years thinks about you?

    Once people have met their basic needs for shelter, water, food, and safety, the next most important things become love, connection, and esteem. Sometimes it is at this point that many of us become caught up in a status game. We feel that we need to have as many symbols of status as possible.

    We can think we want deference and flattery from others, influence and lots of money, fast cars and big houses, expensive clothing and jewellery, and lots of attention. But are any of these things really what is most important to you? If someone was writing your obituary after you died, what would you hope that they would say about the person that you have been and the people that you had the biggest positive impact on?

    We can never fully escape from the various status games, as most people naturally compare themselves to others to see how they are going. This can then impact how people feel about themselves. However, there is some wisdom in just knowing that these games are there, and we can choose which things matter or don’t matter in our lives.

    If my neighbor goes out and buys a fancy sports car or flies first class, I do not have to feel worse about myself if these games do not matter to me. The answer lies in finding and playing the games that do matter.

    It’s also not about getting to a destination, and then enjoying the rest of your life. Chances are that your mind will continue to strive for status in one way or another for the rest of your life. Therefore, there is no end or a happily ever after.

    Storr says that the key is to be happy with the direction that you are heading in and the progress that you are making. If you can live in a sustainable way with the things that really matter to you and feel connected to the people that you care most about, you will know that you are on the right track. Hopefully, your physical and mental health will be better off for it too.

    The final thing that he says, and one that I never used to understand, is that the meaning of life is about being able to keep playing in the ways that are most important to you. It is not about winning.

    Dr Damon Ashworth

    Clinical Psychologist

  • Rewire Your Brain for Effort-Based Rewards

    Rewire Your Brain for Effort-Based Rewards

    We live in a world that often glorifies end results. We care about winning the trophy, getting the promotion, achieving the perfect score. By doing this, many of us unknowingly sabotage our ability to truly enjoy effort and sustain it. But what if we could rewire our brains to find pleasure in the process itself? The science of dopamine and our reward system suggests that we can.

    The Neural Mechanisms of a Growth Mindset

    At the core of developing an authentic growth mindset is the ability to access rewards from effort and action. It is important not to rely solely on the outcome. It requires engaging the prefrontal part of the mesolimbic circuit—a pathway in the brain responsible for motivation and reward. By training ourselves to perceive effort itself as rewarding, we can enhance our ability to persist in challenging tasks.

    This process isn’t easy. When exerting effort—whether in physical exercise, studying, or creative work—you are likely to experience discomfort. Your brain naturally wants to avoid that discomfort, leading to a desire to quit. However, over time, you can train yourself to associate effort with dopamine release. This process effectively rewires your brain to enjoy the challenge itself.

    The Downside of Only Focusing on the End Goal

    Your journey may be unnecessarily painful if your only source of motivation is the reward at the finish line. You deplete your mental energy when you constantly push toward a distant goal. You also strain your physical energy. Learn to enjoy the process to avoid this depletion. Your body becomes dependent on external stimulants—coffee, loud music, social encouragement—just to muster the motivation to keep going.

    Additionally, dopamine plays a key role in marking time. If you’re focused solely on the reward, your brain sees effort as a means to an end. It does not recognise effort as something valuable on its own. This can make each challenge feel increasingly difficult over time, reducing your overall efficiency and resilience.

    How to Rewire Your Brain for Effort-Based Rewards

    The key to long-term motivation is learning to derive satisfaction from the act of effort itself. Here’s how you can start:

    1. Avoid External Dopamine Triggers Before and After Effort
      • Don’t rely on an energy drink before a workout or a promise of a post-work reward to push through. Instead, let the challenge itself be the source of satisfaction.
    2. Mentally Re-frame Friction as a Positive Experience
      • In moments of intense difficulty, tell yourself, “This is good. This is what growth feels like.”
      • Recognize that the pain you feel now will lead to an increase in dopamine release later, making future efforts easier.
    3. Make Effort the Reward
      • Rather than chasing external validation, shift your mindset to enjoying the process. This is a skill that can be cultivated over time.
    4. Repeat and Reinforce
      • The more you practice this, the more automatic it becomes. Over time, your brain will naturally release dopamine during effort, reinforcing the cycle of intrinsic motivation.

    Real-World Examples of This Mindset

    We admire those who master this process. Take David Goggins, for example—a former Navy SEAL who has built a career on mental toughness and embracing discomfort. He and others like him have trained their brains to associate effort with internal reward. This allows them to push past limits that most people never reach.

    Even from an evolutionary standpoint, humans have always revered those who pushed beyond comfort. Hunters, gatherers, and caretakers who endure hardships for the group’s gain. Their ability to find satisfaction in effort itself was a key factor in their survival.

    The Takeaway: Accessing Dopamine Through Effort

    The ability to access dopamine from effort is one of the most powerful tools in our brain and body. It’s not reserved for elite athletes or high achievers—it’s available to all of us. But to tap into this mechanism, we must be mindful of how we structure our motivation.

    • Don’t chase dopamine before effort.
    • Don’t rely on rewards after effort.
    • Learn to spike dopamine from the act of effort itself.

    Embrace this mindset. You can build a more resilient, self-sustaining motivation system. This system makes effort feel rewarding rather than exhausting. In doing so, you’ll unlock a level of potential that many never reach.

    Thanks to Andrew Huberman for introducing me to this concept on one of his episodes of the Huberman Lab. I have been trying to apply it to my life ever since. I think it has made a real difference. I’d be curious to hear if other people have tried this too, and if they think it helps.

    Dr Damon Ashworth

    Clinical Psychologist

  • Part Nine of the Top 100 Non-Fiction Books Countdown: A Curated Guide to Personal Growth (20-11)

    Part Nine of the Top 100 Non-Fiction Books Countdown: A Curated Guide to Personal Growth (20-11)

    In our quest for personal development and understanding, certain books stand out as potentially transformational.

    For the earlier books in the countdown: 100-91, 90-81, 80-71, 70-61, 60-51, 50-41, 40-31, 30-21.

    Here are the next ten and the second last post in the countdown. Each offers unique insights into different aspects of the human experience. These range from overcoming addiction to understanding consciousness, from building wealth to processing grief. Enjoy…

    20. This Naked Mind: Control Alcohol, Find Freedom, Discover Happiness & Change Your Life by Annie Grace

    Goodreads star rating = 4.24/5

    Grace’s approach to alcohol dependency focuses on changing beliefs rather than relying on willpower. People can naturally reduce their desire for alcohol without feeling deprived. It is possible to do this by questioning cultural norms around drinking and understanding psychological triggers.

    What makes it special: Grace combines her business background with extensive research on addiction psychology. She creates an approach that feels empowering rather than restrictive. The book addresses the social conditioning around alcohol that most programs ignore, making sobriety feel like freedom rather than deprivation.

    Perfect for:

    • People wanting to reduce or quit drinking without feeling deprived.
    • Those struggling with alcohol dependency or questioning their relationship with alcohol.
    • Anyone interested in psychological approaches to behaviour change.

    Key takeaway: Sustainable recovery comes from changing your relationship with alcohol through mindset shifts rather than white-knuckling through cravings.

    19. Determined: A Science of Life Without Free Will by Robert M. Sapolsky

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.24/5

    Sapolsky’s exploration of free will is challenging. It argues that our behaviour is largely determined by genetics, brain chemistry, and environmental influences. These factors are beyond our conscious control. This perspective can be unsettling. However, it can foster greater compassion for others. It can also reshape how we think about justice and personal responsibility.

    What makes it special: Sapolsky is a Stanford neuroscientist who seamlessly weaves together neuroscience, psychology, philosophy, and ethics. His argument is rigorous yet accessible, challenging fundamental assumptions about human nature while offering a more compassionate worldview.

    Perfect for:

    • Readers interested in neuroscience, psychology, philosophy, and ethics
    • People exploring the nature of human agency and responsibility
    • Scholars questioning traditional notions of free will and moral responsibility.

    Key takeaway: Understanding the deterministic nature of behaviour can lead to more humane approaches to justice. It can also foster greater empathy for human struggles.

    18. Superabundance: The Story of Population Growth, Innovation, and Human Flourishing on an Infinitely Bountiful Planet by Marian L. Tupy and Gale L. Pooley

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.26

    This optimistic counter-narrative to doom-and-gloom predictions argues that human innovation consistently solves resource challenges. The authors show evidence that population growth drives innovation rather than catastrophe, and that well-functioning markets and institutions create abundance.

    What makes it special: The book challenges prevailing pessimism about population growth and resource scarcity with comprehensive data analysis. Tupy and Pooley introduce the concept of “time price.” This concept explains how long people must work to afford goods. It shows dramatic improvements in human prosperity over time.

    Perfect for:

    • Readers interested in economics, sustainability, population studies, and technology
    • Optimists and skeptics curious about long-term human prospects
    • Policymakers and thinkers focused on global development challenges.

    Key takeaway: Human creativity and innovation have historically overcome resource constraints. This suggests an optimistic future. We can achieve this through maintaining good institutions and embracing technological progress.

    17. How to Change Your Mind: The New Science of Psychedelics by Michael Pollan

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.27/5

    Pollan’s exploration of psychedelics offers a fascinating window into consciousness and the brain’s remarkable plasticity. Beyond the therapeutic potential for treating depression, PTSD, and addiction, these substances show our perception of reality is highly malleable. The book emphasizes that “set and setting”—mindset and environment—are crucial for any transformative experience.

    What makes it special: Pollan combines personal experimentation with rigorous journalism and scientific research. He bridges the gap between ancient wisdom traditions and cutting-edge neuroscience, making complex topics about consciousness accessible to general readers.

    Perfect for:

    • People interested in mental health, consciousness, and spirituality
    • Researchers and therapists curious about psychedelic science;
    • Anyone open to exploring alternative approaches to healing and self-discovery.

    Key takeaway: Consciousness is far more flexible than we imagine. Altered states can offer profound insights. This happens when they are approached with proper preparation and respect.

    16. A Liberated Mind: How to Pivot Toward What Matters by Steven Hayes

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.27/5

    This powerful exploration of psychological flexibility teaches us that mental freedom comes not from avoiding difficult thoughts. It comes from learning to coexist with them. One of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT)’s most powerful concepts is “defusion.” Hayes and ACT believe that the problem is not the thoughts themselves. It is how much we become fused with them. ACT also emphasises the importance of living according to our core values. It advises not avoiding or being controlled by momentary emotions.

    What makes it special: Hayes is the creator of ACT. He provides scientifically-backed techniques. These techniques work better than “positive thinking”. The book offers practical tools like the “thoughts as passengers on a bus” metaphor that make complex psychological concepts accessible.

    Perfect for:

    • People struggling with anxiety, depression, or other mental health challenges that would like to learn more outside of their therapy.
    • People feeling stuck in negative thought patterns.
    • Therapists, counsellors, coaches or anyone seeking practical emotional regulation skills.

    Key takeaway: Suffering is inevitable, but it doesn’t have to control our behaviour. True liberation comes from psychological flexibility and value-driven action.

    15. The Demon-Haunted World: Science as a Candle in the Dark by Carl Sagan

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.29/5

    Sagan’s passionate defense of scientific thinking provides essential tools for navigating our information-rich world. His “Baloney Detection Kit” teaches us to question claims and seek evidence. It encourages maintaining healthy skepticism. At the same time, it helps preserve our sense of wonder about the universe.

    What makes it special: Sagan combines deep scientific expertise with poetic writing and genuine concern for humanity’s future. He shows how scientific thinking enhances our sense of wonder. Rather than diminishing it, this approach adds depth. Sagan argues that critical thinking is essential for democracy.

    Perfect for:

    • Anyone interested in science, skepticism, and rational thought
    • Readers concerned about misinformation and pseudoscience
    • Educators, students, and critical thinkers seeking tools to navigate complex information.

    Key takeaway: Critical thinking and scientific literacy are not just academic pursuits. They are essential life skills. These skills protect us from misinformation. They also enhance our appreciation of reality’s genuine mysteries.

    14. The Psychology of Money: Timeless Lessons on Wealth, Greed and Happiness by Morgan Housel

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.29/5

    Housel reveals that successful money management has more to do with behavior than knowledge. The power of compounding is a central theme. It emphasizes the importance of saving regardless of income level. Additionally, the wisdom of being “reasonable” rather than purely “rational” in financial decisions is highlighted.

    What makes it special: Unlike traditional finance books focused on tactics and formulas, Housel explores the psychology behind money decisions. He uses compelling stories. He provides historical examples to show why smart people make poor financial choices. Our behaviour when it comes to money trumps intelligence.

    Perfect for:

    • Anyone looking to improve their relationship with money,
    • Investors seeking long-term financial wisdom
    • People interested in behavioural finance and personal financial psychology.

    Key takeaway: Wealth is built through consistent behaviour and emotional discipline, not market timing or complex strategies.

    13. Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent and Lead by Brene Brown

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.29

    Brown’s groundbreaking work on vulnerability challenges our cultural obsession with perfection and invulnerability. She argues that vulnerability is not weakness but the birthplace of courage, creativity, and change. From parenting to leadership, vulnerability transforms how we connect with others and ourselves.

    What makes it special: Brown has researched for over a decade. She debunks the myth that vulnerability equals weakness. She uses compelling data and real stories. Her shame resilience theory provides a roadmap for overcoming the fear that keeps us from authentic living.

    Perfect for:

    • Individuals seeking deeper relationships and personal growth
    • Leaders wanting to create authentic and trusting cultures
    • Parents aiming to raise emotionally healthy children.

    Key takeaway: To create authentic connections and meaningful leadership, be courageous. Allow yourself to be vulnerable. Embrace imperfection.

    12. Can’t Hurt Me: Master Your Mind and Defy the Odds by David Goggins

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.30

    Goggins presents an extreme approach to mental toughness. He introduces concepts like the “40% Rule.” When we think we’re at our limit, Goggins says we’re only operating at 40% of our true potential. His “Accountability Mirror” technique forces honest self-reflection. His philosophy of “callousing the mind” involves deliberate hardship. It is meant to build unshakeable resilience. To me, I find it too intense and not the most balanced take on being physically and psychologically healthy.

    What makes it special: Unlike most self-help books, this is brutally honest about the pain required for transformation. Goggins lived through extreme poverty, racism, and abuse, then became a Navy SEAL and ultra-marathon runner. His story is seen as inspirational for many who want to rewrite their lives too.

    Perfect for:

    • Anyone seeking extreme mental toughness and self-discipline
    • Athletes and military personnel facing intense challenges
    • People wanting practical inspiration to overcome seemingly impossible obstacles.

    Key takeaway: Goggins says that most of our limitations are self-imposed. Through extreme discipline and honest self-assessment, we might transcend what we thought was possible.

    11. On Grief and Grieving: Finding the Meaning of Grief Through the Five Stages of Loss by Elisabeth Kubler-Ross and David Kessler

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.32/5

    This compassionate guide helps us understand that grief is not a problem to be solved. It is a process to be experienced. The famous five stages—denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance—are not a rigid sequence. They serve as a framework for understanding the complex emotions that go with loss.

    What makes it special: This book was written by the original creator of the five-stage model, Kübler-Ross. It clarifies misconceptions about grief. It also provides practical guidance. It normalises the messy, non-linear nature of grieving and offers hope without false promises.

    Perfect for:

    • Anyone coping with the death of a loved one or other major loss,
    • Caregivers and therapists supporting grieving individuals,
    • People wanting to understand the emotional landscape of grief before they need it.

    Key takeaway: Grief is deeply personal and non-linear. Healing comes through accepting and honoring our unique grieving process rather than trying to “get over” loss quickly.

    What Resonates With You?

    Despite their diverse topics, these books share several important themes:

    • Acceptance over avoidance: Whether dealing with grief, difficult emotions, or life’s uncertainties, acceptance proves more effective than resistance.
    • The power of perspective: How we think about our circumstances often matters more than the circumstances themselves.
    • Growth through challenge: Difficult experiences, when properly processed, become sources of strength and wisdom.
    • The importance of evidence-based thinking: In finance, science, or personal development, decisions based on evidence are more successful than wishful thinking.

    Each of these books have earned high ratings. They offer practical wisdom that can genuinely transform how we think and live. They remind us that growth is possible at any stage of life. Understanding ourselves and our world more deeply is always worthwhile.

    Stay tuned for the top 10…

    Dr Damon Ashworth

    Clinical Psychologist

  • Ten Books for Deep Thinking: Focus, Compassion, and Life’s Big Questions (30-21)

    Ten Books for Deep Thinking: Focus, Compassion, and Life’s Big Questions (30-21)

    My top 100 non-fiction books countdown explores some of life’s most profound challenges. It addresses how to make a meaningful difference and overcome our mental limitations. It also delves into facing mortality and cultivating wisdom in an increasingly complex world.

    For earlier books in the countdown: 100-91, 90-81, 80-71, 70-61, 60-51, 50-41, 40-31.

    Here are books 30-21…

    30. Doing Good Better: How Effective Altruism Can Help You Make a Difference by William MacAskill

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.19/5

    MacAskill introduces effective altruism—using evidence and reason to determine how to do the most good possible. This approach does not rely on intuition or emotion. It evaluates causes and charities based on effectiveness. This helps assess scalability and how neglected causes are to maximise positive impact.

    What makes it special: This book transforms charity from an emotional impulse into rigorous science. It shows how small donations can save lives when directed effectively. It challenges conventional wisdom about giving and career choices with data-driven analysis.

    Perfect for: People who want to make a meaningful difference in the world, such as donors, philanthropists, and social entrepreneurs. Additionally, anyone curious about rational approaches to ethics and giving.

    Key takeaway: Consider cost-effectiveness when giving—some interventions are thousands of times more effective than others. Choose careers based on your ability to have a positive impact. You can do this directly through your work or by “earning to give.”

    29. ‘The Brain that Changes Itself: Stories of Personal Triumph from the Frontiers of Brain Science’ by Norman Doidge

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.20/5

    Doidge reveals the revolutionary discovery of neuroplasticity—the brain’s ability to reorganize and form new neural connections throughout life. Through compelling case studies, he shows how people have overcome strokes, learning disabilities, and brain damage by harnessing the brain’s capacity to rewire itself.

    What makes it special: This book fundamentally challenged how we understood the brain. Doidge encouraged us to stop thinking of it as a “fixed machine” to a more dynamic, adaptable organ. The real-life stories of recovery and transformation are both scientifically rigorous and deeply inspiring.

    Perfect for: People interested in neuroscience, psychology, rehabilitation, and self-improvement. Patients recovering from brain injuries or neurological conditions or their family and friends may be interested. Also, educators and therapists looking for evidence-based approaches.

    Key takeaway: “Use it or lose it”—neural circuits strengthen with practice and weaken without use. Mental practice, visualisation, and focused attention can physically reshape your brain, making learning and recovery possible at any age.

    28. Enlightenment Now: The Case for Reason, Science, Humanism, and Progress by Steven Pinker

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.20/5

    Pinker presents overwhelming evidence that human progress is real and measurable. Despite negative news cycles, metrics like life expectancy, poverty reduction, literacy rates, and declining violence show dramatic improvements. These improvements are driven by Enlightenment values of reason, science, and humanism.

    What makes it special: This meticulously researched book counters pessimism with hard data. It shows that the world is actually getting better by most objective measures. Pinker doesn’t ignore current challenges but provides essential perspective on long-term trends.

    Perfect for: Readers interested in history, science, philosophy, and social progress. It also suits skeptics and optimists seeking a data-driven perspective. Educators, policymakers, and advocates of reason and humanism will find it appealing too.

    Key takeaway: Progress is fragile and requires active defense through education, critical thinking, and continued application of scientific methods. Optimism should be grounded in evidence, not ideology.

    27. Four Thousand Weeks: Time Management for Mortals by Oliver Burkeman

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.20/5

    Burkeman argues that traditional productivity advice fails because it ignores our fundamental limitation. We don’t have an infinite amount of time. Therefore, we will always have to prioritise some things and not do others. Instead of trying to optimise everything, we should embrace our finitude, accept uncertainty, and focus deeply on what truly matters.

    What makes it special: This book is an antidote to toxic productivity culture. It offers a philosophical approach to time management that prioritises meaning over efficiency. It challenges the entire premise of most time management advice.

    Perfect for: Anyone overwhelmed by time pressure or productivity culture. It’s also ideal for people seeking a more meaningful, balanced relationship with time. Additionally, it suits readers interested in philosophy, psychology, and self-help with a realistic approach.

    Key takeaway: Stop trying to control everything and instead focus on a few meaningful projects. Embrace the “joy of missing out” and accept that some things will remain unfinished—this reduces pressure and increases presence.

    26. The Hard Thing About Hard Things: Building a Business When There Are No Easy Answers – Straight Talk on the Challenges of Entrepreneurship by Ben Horowitz

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.21/5

    Horowitz provides unvarnished advice for entrepreneurs and leaders facing the brutal realities of building companies. Unlike business school theory, this book focuses on making tough decisions with incomplete information. It emphasises managing during crises and maintaining psychological resilience as a leader.

    What makes it special: This is a rare business book. It honestly addresses the emotional and psychological toll of leadership. Horowitz combines practical advice with vulnerable personal stories from his experience as a CEO and venture capitalist.

    Perfect for: Startup founders, CEOs, and business leaders. Entrepreneurs navigating uncertainty and growth. Anyone interested in leadership, management, and entrepreneurship.

    Key takeaway: There is no recipe for success in real-world business—you must be comfortable making decisions without perfect information. Lead with candor, focus on building strong culture, and develop systems to manage your own psychology during difficult periods.

    25. Zen Mind, Beginner’s Mind: Informal Talks on Zen Meditation and Practice by Shunryu Suzuki

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.22/5

    Suzuki introduces the essential Zen concept of “beginner’s mind”—approaching life with openness, eagerness, and freedom from preconceptions. Expert’s mind, filled with fixed ideas, limits perception and learning, while beginner’s mind remains curious and receptive.

    What makes it special: This slim, profound book distills centuries of Zen wisdom. It offers accessible insights about mindfulness, acceptance, and presence. It’s both a meditation guide and a philosophy for approaching all of life with greater awareness.

    Perfect for: Beginners and seasoned practitioners of meditation and Zen. It is ideal for anyone seeking a mindful, open, and grounded approach to life. It also suits people interested in spirituality, philosophy, and self-awareness.

    Key takeaway: Maintain beginner’s mind in all activities—approach each moment with fresh attention rather than assumptions. Practice with full attention while letting go of attachment to specific results.

    24. Radical Compassion: Learning to Love Yourself and Your World with the Practice of RAIN by Tara Brach

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.22/5

    Brach presents the RAIN practice—Recognize, Accept, Investigate, Nurture—as a method for developing radical compassion toward ourselves and others. This mindfulness-based approach transforms difficult emotions and experiences through kind, curious awareness rather than resistance.

    What makes it special: This book provides a practical, step-by-step method for developing emotional resilience and compassion. Brach combines Buddhist wisdom with modern psychology, making ancient practices accessible for contemporary healing.

    Perfect for: People struggling with self-criticism, anxiety, or emotional pain. It is also suitable for those seeking a practical path to mindfulness and compassion. Therapists, caregivers, and anyone interested in emotional healing might find it beneficial.

    Key takeaway: Instead of pushing away discomfort, use RAIN to befriend and understand difficult experiences. Self-compassion creates the foundation for genuine compassion toward others and healing in the world.

    23. Staring at the Sun: Overcoming the Terror of Death by Irvin D. Yalom

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.23/5

    Yalom, a renowned existential therapist, explores how fear of death underlies much of our anxiety and psychological suffering. He argues that facing mortality directly, rather than avoiding it, actually enhances life appreciation and reduces existential anxiety.

    What makes it special: This book tackles the ultimate taboo—death—with therapeutic wisdom and philosophical depth. Yalom combines clinical experience with personal reflection, showing how death awareness can be liberating rather than paralyzing.

    Perfect for: People struggling with death anxiety or grief. Therapists and Counsellors working with existential issues; anyone interested in existential psychology and personal growth.

    Key takeaway: Awareness of mortality does not create despair. Instead, it motivates us to prioritise what truly matters. It encourages us to live more authentically. Love and connection provide meaning that transcends individual existence.

    22. Stolen Focus: Why You Can’t Pay Attention – and How to Think Deeply Again by Johann Hari

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.23/5

    Hari investigates the modern attention crisis, revealing how technology companies, work culture, and environmental factors systematically fragment our focus. He argues that reclaiming deep attention requires both personal practices and systemic changes to how society is organized.

    What makes it special: This book combines personal narrative with investigative journalism. It reveals how the “attention economy” exploits human psychology for profit. Hari provides both individual solutions and calls for broader societal reform.

    Perfect for: Anyone struggling with distraction or seeking better focus. It is also ideal for educators, employers, and policymakers interested in attention and productivity. Additionally, it suits readers concerned about the impact of technology on society.

    Key takeaway: Technology companies profit from fragmented attention, deliberately designing platforms to maximize engagement at the cost of deep thinking. Reclaiming focus requires both personal boundaries and systemic changes to protect human attention.

    21. The School of Life: An Emotional Education by Alain de Botton

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.24/5

    De Botton argues that traditional education fails to teach the most important life skills: understanding emotions, building relationships, handling disappointment, and finding meaning. He presents emotional education as essential curriculum for navigating adult life with wisdom and resilience.

    What makes it special: This book fills the gap left by formal education. It teaches practical emotional and social skills through philosophical reflection. De Botton makes psychology and philosophy accessible while addressing universal human challenges.

    Perfect for: Anyone seeking practical emotional skills to improve life quality. It suits those interested in personal growth, relationships, and mental well-being. It is also for readers frustrated by traditional education’s lack of emotional focus.

    Key takeaway: Self-knowledge is foundational to emotional health—understanding your triggers, fears, and desires enables wiser choices. Balance ambition with contentment, and practice compassion and forgiveness as learnable skills.

    The Ultimate Integration

    This collection reveals the deepest patterns in human flourishing:

    • Face reality directly. Face death anxiety, attention fragmentation, or entrepreneurial challenges head-on. Growth comes from honest confrontation with difficult truths.
    • Compassion can help you transform. RAIN practice and Zen acceptance are methods you can use. Approaching ourselves and others with kindness creates the conditions for healing and growth.
    • Sometime evidence is more accurate than our intuition. Data-driven approaches often reveal counterintuitive truths. This is true whether in giving effectively or understanding brain plasticity.
    • Focus on the present. From Zen mindfulness to mortality awareness, focusing on the here-and-now enhances both peace and effectiveness.

    Your Wisdom Practice

    Remember: the books that change your life aren’t necessarily the ones that comfort you. They are the ones that expand your understanding of what’s possible. This expansion occurs when you approach yourself, others, and life’s challenges with greater awareness, skill, compassion, and courage.

    Stay tuned for the next 10 books…

    Dr Damon Ashworth

    Clinical Psychologist

  • Ten Books That Could Help Shift Your Mindset and Improve Your Performance: 40-31

    Ten Books That Could Help Shift Your Mindset and Improve Your Performance: 40-31

    This is part seven in my ten part series of the top 100 non-fiction books that I have read recently. The majority of these books have a psychology focus, but not all of them do.

    The consistent theme across these ten books is asking the reader to challenge preconceived notions. They encourage readers to question ideas they already have, or provides new ways or frameworks to think about well-known topics.

    We can impact our lives in several ways. We can change our expectations. We can better understand ourselves, our brains, or how the world works. We can look at the best solutions rather than those that merely help us feel good. We can also know when to walk away and focus on what is in our control.

    For earlier posts in this countdown: 100 to 91, 90 to 81, 80 to 71, 70 to 61, 60 to 51, and 50 to 41.

    Here are books 40 to 31…

    40. The Expectation Effect: How Your Mindset Can Change Your World by David Robson

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.16/5

    Robson reveals the extraordinary power of expectations to shape our experiences and outcomes. From placebo effects in medicine to stereotype threat in performance, what we expect often becomes reality through self-fulfilling prophecies. They alter brain chemistry and neural pathways.

    What makes it special: This book connects neuroscience, psychology, and practical application. It shows how expectations influence everything from physical healing to relationship dynamics. It provides a scientific foundation for the power of positive thinking without New Age mysticism.

    Perfect for: Individuals seeking personal growth, better health, or improved performance. It’s ideal for educators and therapists wanting to leverage mindset in practice. It’s also suitable for anyone interested in the science of belief, placebo effects, and psychology.

    Key takeaway: You can consciously change your expectations through awareness of limiting beliefs, visualization, and positive self-talk. Cultural narratives also shape individual outcomes, making collective expectation management important.

    39. Misbehaving: The Making of Behavioural Economics by Richard H. Thaler

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.16/5

    Nobel laureate Thaler chronicles how behavioural economics challenged traditional economic models by showing that humans are predictably irrational. We engage in mental accounting, succumb to loss aversion, and can be “nudged” toward better decisions through smart choice architecture.

    What makes it special: This is an insider’s account of how a field was born, told by one of its founders. Thaler combines rigorous science with engaging storytelling, showing how understanding irrationality can improve policy, business, and personal decisions.

    Perfect for: Economists, policymakers, marketers, and anyone curious about why people make “irrational” decisions. It’s also ideal for readers interested in psychology, decision-making, and practical applications of behavioural science.

    Key takeaway: Small changes in how choices are presented can dramatically improve outcomes without restricting freedom. Understanding biases like loss aversion and present bias helps you make better personal and professional decisions.

    38. 21 Lessons for the 21st Century by Yuval Noah Harari

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.16/5

    Harari examines the most pressing challenges of our time. Artificial intelligence is reshaping work. Fake news is threatening democracy. Nationalism conflicts with globalism. We need new forms of education and meaning-making in an age of unprecedented change.

    What makes it special: Harari combines historical perspective with cutting-edge analysis of current trends. He offers both big-picture thinking and practical guidance. He doesn’t just diagnose problems, but explores what individuals and societies can do about them.

    Perfect for: Readers interested in current affairs, technology, philosophy, and global trends. It is also suitable for leaders, educators, and citizens who are navigating the 21st century’s complexities. Fans of Harari’s earlier works (Sapiens, Homo Deus) will enjoy this as well.

    Key takeaway: The pace of change is unprecedented, making critical thinking, adaptability, and lifelong learning essential skills. Education must shift from teaching facts to teaching how to learn, unlearn, and think critically.

    37. False Alarm: How Climate Change Panic Costs Us Trillions, Hurts the Poor, and Fails to Fix the Planet by Bjorn Lomborg

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.17/5

    Lomborg argues that while climate change is real and serious, panic-driven policies are often costly and ineffective. He advocates for pragmatic solutions focused on innovation, adaptation, and cost-benefit analysis. He believes in choosing these methods over alarmism, which can hurt the world’s poorest populations.

    What makes it special: This book challenges climate orthodoxy with data-driven analysis, advocating for evidence-based policy over emotional responses. Lomborg brings an economist’s perspective to environmental issues, prioritizing human welfare alongside planetary health.

    Perfect for: Policymakers, environmentalists, economists, and concerned citizens. It is also ideal for readers interested in climate science, policy, and economics.

    Key takeaway: Innovation and adaptation are more effective than panic-driven policies. Focus resources on cost-effective solutions that provide the greatest global benefit while avoiding measures that primarily harm the poor.

    36. Deep Work: Rules for Focused Success in a Distracted World by Cal Newport

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.17/5

    Newport distinguishes between “deep work” (cognitively demanding activities performed in focused concentration) and “shallow work” (logistical tasks done while distracted). In our hyper-connected world, the ability to focus deeply has become both rare and valuable.

    What makes it special: This book offers a comprehensive philosophy. It also provides a practical system for reclaiming focus in the age of distraction. Newport combines research with actionable strategies, showing how deep work creates disproportionate value and personal satisfaction.

    Perfect for: Knowledge workers, creatives, students, and professionals aiming to maximise productivity. It is also ideal for anyone overwhelmed by distractions looking for practical strategies to regain focus.

    Key takeaway: Create rituals and environments that support deep work. Embrace boredom to train focus. Quit or dramatically reduce social media use. Schedule every minute of your day to minimise shallow work.

    35. Thinking, Fast and Slow by Daniel Kahneman

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.17

    Kahneman reveals how our minds function through two systems: System 1 (fast, automatic, intuitive) and System 2 (slow, deliberate, rational). Understanding these systems and their biases—from loss aversion to overconfidence—can dramatically improve decision-making.

    What makes it special: This Nobel Prize winner’s masterwork synthesizes decades of groundbreaking research in behavioral psychology and economics. It fundamentally changes how you understand human judgment and decision-making.

    Perfect for: Anyone interested in psychology, behavioural economics, or decision-making. It is also suitable for those wanting to improve their critical thinking. Professionals in business, finance, policy, and personal development could also benefit.

    Key takeaway: Most decisions are made by the fast, biased System 1. Engaging the slow, deliberate System 2 through reflection and awareness can help detect and correct systematic errors in thinking.

    34. Mating in Captivity: Reconciling the Erotic and the Domestic by Esther Perel

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.17/5

    Perel explores the central paradox of modern relationships. We seek both security and excitement from the same person. However, these needs often conflict. She shows how couples can maintain desire and eroticism within the safety of committed relationships.

    What makes it special: Perel brings a sophisticated perspective to sexuality and relationships. She offers a culturally informed view and challenges conventional wisdom about love and desire. Her approach is both deeply psychological and refreshingly practical.

    Perfect for: Couples who are struggling with desire and intimacy in long-term relationships. It is also ideal for therapists, counsellors, and sex educators. Additionally, it is suitable for anyone interested in understanding the complexities of love, desire, and connection.

    Key takeaway: Desire requires mystery, autonomy, and separateness—qualities that security tends to erode. Couples can cultivate erotic intelligence through maintaining individuality, exploring fantasies, and communicating desires without shame.

    33. Quit: The Power of Knowing When to Walk Away by Annie Duke

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.17/5

    Duke challenges the cultural myth that persistence is always virtuous. She shows that strategic quitting can save resources. It can also open better opportunities. She provides frameworks for making rational quit-or-continue decisions based on evidence rather than emotion.

    What makes it special: This book tackles one of the most difficult aspects of decision-making. It focuses on knowing when to give up. It does so with the poker player’s analytical precision. Duke combines decision science with practical tools for overcoming the sunk-cost fallacy and social pressure.

    Perfect for: Entrepreneurs, professionals, and creatives who face tough decisions. It suits anyone struggling with perfectionism, over-commitment, or indecision. It is also ideal for leaders seeking to foster adaptive decision-making.

    Key takeaway: Set clear, measurable criteria for success and failure before starting projects. Regularly reassess based on new evidence, and create cultures that support “good quits” rather than blind persistence.

    32. Exercised: Why Something We Never Evolved to Do Is Healthy and Rewarding by Daniel Lieberman

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.18/5

    Lieberman explains why formal exercise feels unnatural. We evolved for varied movement, not repetitive workouts. He demonstrates why exercise is still essential for modern health though. He explores how to make physical activity more enjoyable and sustainable by aligning it with our evolutionary heritage.

    What makes it special: This book bridges evolutionary biology, exercise science, and practical fitness advice. It explains both why we resist exercise and how to overcome that resistance. Lieberman debunks fitness myths while providing science-based guidance.

    Perfect for: Anyone interested in health, fitness, and human evolution. It’s also suitable for health professionals, trainers, and policymakers. This is ideal for people seeking motivation and science-based insights on exercise.

    Key takeaway: Humans evolved for varied, purposeful movement, not formal exercise. Make physical activity more sustainable by focusing on variety, enjoyment, social connection, and movements that mimic natural human activities.

    31. The Inner Game of Tennis: The Classic Guide to the Mental Side of Peak Performance by Timothy Gallwey and Pete Carroll

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.18/5

    Gallwey introduces the concept of Self 1 (the judgmental, controlling conscious mind) and Self 2 (the natural, capable subconscious). Peak performance occurs when Self 1 quiets down and trusts Self 2 to perform without interference.

    What makes it special: Though ostensibly about tennis, this book revolutionized thinking about performance psychology across all domains. Its principles apply to any skill-based activity, from sports to music to business presentations.

    Perfect for: Athletes, performers, and anyone seeking peak mental and physical performance. It is also ideal for people struggling with performance anxiety, self-doubt, or overthinking. Coaches and educators interested in the psychology of learning and mastery will find it valuable too.

    Key takeaway: Stop trying to control every aspect of performance and instead develop non-judgmental awareness. Trust your body’s natural abilities, stay present-focused, and let go of self-criticism to access flow states.

    The Meta-Lessons

    • Expectations shape reality. There are various ways this happens, like through placebo effects, self-fulfilling prophecies, or behavioural nudges. What we expect profoundly influences what we experience.
    • Our minds are predictably irrational. Understanding cognitive biases and decision-making flaws enables better choices in all areas of life.
    • Focus is the new superpower. In an age of infinite distraction, the ability to concentrate deeply creates disproportionate value and satisfaction.
    • Peak performance requires getting out of your own way. Whether in sports, relationships, or decision-making, overthinking and self-interference often prevent optimal outcomes.

    Choose one book to implement insights from, instead of trying all at once. Make sure that it addresses your most pressing challenge right now. Master its principles through consistent practice before moving onto the next. Remember that transformation happens through depth, not breadth—through truly understanding and applying core principles rather than collecting more information.

    The goal isn’t to read more books but to live the wisdom they contain.

    Stay tuned for the next ten books in my countdown…

    Dr Damon Ashworth

    Clinical Psychologist

  • Part Six of the Top 100 Non-fiction Books: Understanding Human Nature for Personal Growth (50-41)

    Part Six of the Top 100 Non-fiction Books: Understanding Human Nature for Personal Growth (50-41)

    For the earlier titles in the countdown: 100 – 91, 90 – 81, 80 – 71, 70 – 61, 60 – 51

    Here’s the next ten…

    50. The One Thing: The Surprisingly Simple Truth Behind Extraordinary Results by Gary Keller and Jay Papasan

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.13/5

    In a world of endless distractions, Keller argues that extraordinary results come from identifying your most important task. Focusing on this task above all else can lead to great achievements. Success is built sequentially, not simultaneously—like dominoes, small focused efforts compound into extraordinary outcomes.

    What makes it special: This book challenges the modern myth of multitasking. It questions work-life balance. Instead, it advocates for intentional imbalance and extreme focus during crucial periods. The “focusing question” provides a daily compass for decision-making.

    Perfect for: Entrepreneurs, professionals, creatives, or students who feel overwhelmed, distracted, or busy but unproductive. It is also ideal for anyone looking to achieve extraordinary success by simplifying their focus. Readers of Atomic Habits, Deep Work, or Essentialism will find this beneficial.

    Key takeaway: Ask daily: “What’s the ONE Thing I can do right now, such that by doing it, everything else becomes easier or unnecessary?” Time-block your first 4-5 hours for this priority.

    49. Transcend: The New Science of Self-Actualization by Scott Barry Kaufman

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.13/5

    Kaufman updates Maslow’s hierarchy of needs with modern research, revealing that human needs aren’t linear but fluid. Self-actualization isn’t a destination but a continual unfolding of your authentic potential, balancing security needs with growth aspirations.

    What makes it special: This book corrects decades of misunderstanding about Maslow’s work while integrating cutting-edge positive psychology research. It shows how trauma blocks growth but can be healed, and how transcendence serves something greater while including the self.

    Perfect for: Psychologists, therapists, and coaches interested in positive psychology and human potential. It is also ideal for anyone seeking personal growth, healing, and purpose beyond material success. Fans of Maslow, Carl Rogers, The Road to Character, or Man’s Search for Meaning should like it.

    Key takeaway: Self-actualization requires balancing security (safety, connection, self-esteem) with growth (exploration, love, purpose, creativity). Peak experiences can be cultivated through mindfulness, art, nature, and helping others.

    48. The Hero With a Thousand Faces by Joseph Campbell

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.13/5

    Campbell’s groundbreaking work reveals that myths from every culture share the same basic structure—the Hero’s Journey. This monomyth of Departure, Initiation, and Return is not just a story formula. It is a map of psychological and spiritual growth that we can all experience in our lives.

    What makes it special: This book fundamentally influenced modern storytelling (Star Wars, Harry Potter, The Matrix). It also provides a profound framework for understanding personal transformation. It connects ancient wisdom to modern psychology through the lens of mythology.

    Perfect for: Writers, creators, and filmmakers who want to understand story structure and mythology. Thinkers, seekers, and therapists interested in personal transformation. Anyone on a journey of healing, growth, or purpose who wants a map for the inner quest.

    Key takeaway: We are all the hero of our own journey. Every challenge signifies a “threshold” to cross. Transformation requires facing our fears. We must let old versions of ourselves “die” to be reborn into a fuller life.

    47. The Status Game: On Social Position and How We Use It by Will Storr

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.13/5

    Storr claims that status—being respected and valued by others—is a fundamental human drive. It shapes everything from social media behaviour to political tribalism. We play three types of status games: dominance (power-based), prestige (skill-based), and virtue (morality-based).

    What makes it special: This book explains seemingly irrational human behaviours through the lens of status competition. It offers insights into online outrage, cancel culture and political polarisation. It’s social psychology that makes sense of our current cultural moment.

    Perfect for: Anyone interested in psychology, social behaviour, or culture wars. It is ideal for leaders, educators, and creators who want to understand group dynamics and motivation. You might also like it if you have enjoyed reading Sapiens, The Righteous Mind, or The Elephant in the Brain.

    Key takeaway: You can’t opt out of status games, but you can choose wisely. Focus on prestige games that help others rise with you, rather than dominance or virtue games that keep others down.

    46. No Bad Parts: Healing Trauma and Restoring Wholeness with the Internal Family Systems Model by Richard C. Schwartz and Alanis Morrisette

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.14/5

    Schwartz shows that our minds contain different “parts” using the Internal Family Systems model. These parts include the Inner Critic, Worrier, and Protector. They often conflict but try to help us. Healing happens when our Compassionate Self befriends and leads these parts rather than fighting them.

    What makes it special: This revolutionary therapeutic approach treats internal conflict with curiosity instead of judgment. It recognises that every part was formed with a positive intention initially. It makes complex psychology accessible and practical.

    Perfect for: Trauma survivors, therapists, and anyone interested in self-compassion and inner healing. It is also suitable for people who struggle with internal conflict, self-criticism, or emotional overwhelm. Fans of mindfulness, psychotherapy, and integrative approaches to mental health will also find it appealing.

    Key takeaway: No part of you is “bad”—each has a role and positive intent. Healing requires gentle dialogue with your parts, acknowledging their fears and allowing them to relax and cooperate.

    45. Self Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself by Kristin Neff

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.14/5

    Neff’s research-backed approach to self-compassion involves three core elements. The first is self-kindness instead of self-criticism. The second is common humanity, recognizing that suffering is universal. The third is mindfulness, which is balanced awareness of painful experiences.

    What makes it special: Unlike self-esteem, which depends on success and comparison, self-compassion is unconditional. It actually encourages growth rather than complacency. Neff debunks myths while providing practical tools backed by rigorous research.

    Perfect for: Anyone struggling with self-criticism, perfectionism, anxiety, or depression. It is also suitable for people seeking greater emotional resilience and well-being. Therapists and coaches wanting practical tools to help clients cultivate kindness could benefit too.

    Key takeaway: Self-compassion reduces anxiety and depression while fostering resilience and motivation. Treat yourself with the same kindness you’d show a good friend facing difficulties.

    44. Tiny Habits: The Small Changes That Change Everything by BJ Fogg

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.14/5

    Fogg’s behaviour change method focuses on starting tiny. It recommends two push-ups, not a workout. You should anchor new habits to existing routines. Celebrate right after you have successfully done what you said you would do. This approach reduces resistance and allows habits to grow naturally over time.

    What makes it special: This method is based on decades of Stanford research. It works because it aligns with how the brain actually forms habits. It’s sustainable because it doesn’t rely on willpower but on smart design and environmental cues.

    Perfect for: This is ideal for anyone struggling to build new habits. It also suits those trying to sustain behaviour change. People overwhelmed by big goals will find it offers a simple, effective approach. It’s also perfect for coaches, therapists, and productivity seekers who are looking for practical habit strategies.

    Key takeaway: Start so small you can’t fail, anchor to existing routines, and celebrate immediately. Focus on the behaviour, not the outcome—habits will grow naturally as confidence increases.

    43. The Imp of the Mind: Exploring the Silent Epidemic of Obsessive Bad Thoughts by Lee Baer

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.15/5

    Baer normalizes the universal experience of unwanted, disturbing thoughts—the mind’s mischievous “imp.” These intrusive thoughts don’t show our desires or intentions. They’re just mental events that become problematic when we try to suppress or fight them.

    What makes it special: This book addresses a “silent epidemic” that most people suffer with in shame and isolation. Baer explains why thought suppression backfires and provides hope through evidence-based treatment approaches like Exposure and Response Prevention.

    Perfect for: People suffering from OCD, intrusive thoughts, or anxiety. It is also ideal for therapists and clinicians treating obsessive-compulsive and related disorders. Finally, it suits anyone wanting to understand why unwanted thoughts happen and how to reduce their power.

    Key takeaway: You are not your thoughts. Intrusive thoughts are normal mental events, not reflections of your character or desires. Acceptance and mindfulness reduce their emotional impact more effectively than suppression.

    42. Triumphs of Experience: The Men of the Harvard Grant Study by George E. Vaillant

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.15/5

    Vaillant draws from the Harvard Grant Study, which followed men for over 75 years. He reveals what actually predicts happiness and health. These predictors include close relationships and emotional intelligence. Healthy coping mechanisms, continued learning, and adaptability are also important.

    What makes it special: This is one of the most comprehensive longitudinal studies ever conducted. It provides unprecedented insights into what makes life worth living. The findings often contradict popular assumptions about success and happiness.

    Perfect for: This book is ideal for anyone interested in psychology, aging, relationships, and well-being. It suits therapists and researchers focused on long-term mental health. It also appeals to readers seeking evidence-based insights on what leads to a meaningful, happy life.

    Key takeaway: Good relationships are the strongest predictor of happiness and health. Career success, wealth, and fame don’t strongly correlate with life satisfaction—purpose, meaning, and emotional maturity do.

    41. The Obstacle is the Way: The Timeless Art of Turning Trials Into Triumph by Ryan Holiday

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.15/5

    Drawing from ancient Stoic philosophy, Holiday shows how to transform obstacles into opportunities. This is achieved through three disciplines. The first one is Perception, which is about controlling your mindset. The second is Action, which involves taking persistent steps. The last one is Will, which means cultivating inner strength and accepting what you can’t control.

    What makes it special: This book makes ancient Stoic wisdom applicable to modern challenges. It uses historical examples to show how great leaders turned adversity into advantage. It’s philosophy that works in practice.

    Perfect for: This is ideal for anyone facing challenges or setbacks. It’s suitable for leaders, entrepreneurs, athletes, and creatives looking for mental toughness. It will also appeal to fans of Stoic philosophy or books like Meditations by Marcus Aurelius.

    Key takeaway: Practice “amor fati” (love of fate)—embrace obstacles as opportunities to build character. Focus only on what you can control: your attitude, actions, and responses to circumstances.

    These books reveal several powerful patterns for advanced personal development:

    • Focus creates extraordinary results – Concentrating effort leads to success. The One Thing emphasises singular focus. Tiny Habits highlights the power of small changes.
    • Integration beats suppression – From self-compassion to internal parts work, healing comes through acceptance and integration, not fighting or denial.
    • Ancient wisdom applies to modern challenges – Stoic philosophy, mythological patterns, and humanistic psychology offer timeless frameworks for contemporary struggles.
    • Understanding human nature enables better choices. Awareness of status games, intrusive thoughts, or relationship patterns improves decision-making. Understanding how we function (not just how we think we function) leads to wiser decisions.

    Remember: personal transformation isn’t about perfection. It’s about understanding yourself and others more deeply. Then, applying that understanding with patience, compassion, and persistent action.

    Stay tuned for the next ten books…

    Dr Damon Ashworth

    Clinical Psychologist

  • Top 100 Non-Fiction Books Countdown: Part Five (60-51)

    Top 100 Non-Fiction Books Countdown: Part Five (60-51)

    For the earlier books and descriptions in the countdown: 100-91, 90-81, 80-71, 70-61.

    Here is part five…

    60. How to Know a Person: The Art of Seeing Others Deeply and Being Deeply Seen by David Brooks

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.09/5

    In our distracted world, most people feel unseen and unheard. Brooks reveals that we can be “illuminators” who make others feel valued. Alternatively, we can be “diminishers” who cause people to feel overlooked. The key to deep connection lies not just in hearing words, but in perceiving emotions, body language, and unspoken needs.

    What makes it special: Brooks connects interpersonal understanding to democracy and social cohesion. He makes the case that truly seeing others is a personal skill and a civic duty. It’s rare to find a book that links individual empathy to societal healing.

    Perfect for: People wanting to improve emotional intelligence. It is also ideal for therapists and coaches, partners and parents. Anyone struggling to bridge differences could benefit. Introverts or awkward conversationalists looking for practical guidance will find it helpful too.

    Key takeaway: Small moments of genuine attention—making eye contact, remembering details, asking thoughtful questions—can have profound impact on relationships.

    59. Mindset: The New Psychology of Success by Carol S. Dweck

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.10/5

    Dweck’s groundbreaking research shows that how we think about our abilities shapes our success. Those with a “fixed mindset” believe talents are static. They are less likely to keep putting in effort to get better at something. In contrast, those with a “growth mindset” see abilities as things that can develop through effort and learning.

    What makes it special: It is backed by decades of rigorous research across various domains. These include schools, sports, and corporate boardrooms. This isn’t just theory. It is proven science that can be applied everywhere. The simplicity of the concept belies its profound impact.

    Perfect for: Students and educators. Parents, caregivers, therapists and coaches will find it useful. Professionals, entrepreneurs, athletes and performers might also find it beneficial. Essentially, it’s for anyone facing change, setbacks, or self-doubt.

    Key takeaway: Praise effort and strategy, not intelligence. View failures as learning opportunities rather than proof of inadequacy.

    58. The Science of Trust: Emotional Attunement for Couples by John M. Gottman

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.10/5

    Trust isn’t built through grand gestures but in everyday “sliding door moments”—small opportunities to connect or turn away. Gottman’s research shows that how couples handle conflict and respond to each other’s bids for connection determines relationship success.

    What makes it special: Gottman can predict divorce with over 90% accuracy using mathematical models. This isn’t relationship advice based on opinion—it’s hard science applied to love, filled with measurable metrics and proven interventions.

    Perfect for: Couples, especially those in long-term or committed relationships. It’s ideal for therapists and relationship coaches. Individuals recovering from betrayal or disconnection could find it enlightening. Students of psychology or counselling will find it useful. Analytical thinkers interested in emotional dynamics are welcome too.

    Key takeaway: Trust is dynamic and evolves with every interaction. Focus on emotional attunement and repair attempts rather than perfection.

    57. How Emotions Are Made: The Secret Life of the Brain by Lisa Feldman Barrett

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.10/5

    Barrett challenges the traditional view of emotions as hardwired reactions. Instead, she reveals that emotions are constructed by our brains using past experiences to interpret bodily sensations and context.

    What makes it special: This book completely overturns everything you thought you knew about emotions. Barrett dismantles decades of psychological orthodoxy with cutting-edge neuroscience. She offers a radical new understanding that emotions are cultural, learned and therefore changeable.

    Perfect for: Psychology and neuroscience enthusiasts. Students and academics. Mental health professionals and therapists. Curious readers interested in self-understanding. Anthropologists. People interested in emotional intelligence.

    Key takeaway: Since emotions are constructed, they’re malleable. Developing emotional granularity—the ability to distinguish between different emotions—improves mental health and emotional regulation.

    56. Be Useful: Seven Tools for Life by Arnold Schwarzenegger

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.11/5

    Schwarzenegger distills his life philosophy into practical wisdom. His emphasis is on being useful—contributing meaningfully—rather than just being impressive.

    What makes it special: This isn’t typical celebrity memoir fluff. Schwarzenegger’s achievements in three distinct areas offer a rare case study. He excelled as a bodybuilding champion, a Hollywood superstar, and a politician. His story shows reinvention and sustained excellence across different domains.

    Perfect for: Anyone feeling stuck or aimless who wants clear and practical life advice. It’s also great for fans of Arnold’s life story who seek motivation mixed with personal responsibility. Young adults or career changers looking for structure and inspiration may benefit too.

    Key takeaway: Success demands sacrifice and relentless effort. Use criticism as fuel and turn every failure into feedback for improvement. Have a clear vision. Work relentlessly. Ignore naysayers. Learn from failure. Listen to mentors. Give back.

    55. Hidden Potential: The Science of Achieving Greater Things by Adam M. Grant

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.11/5

    Grant argues that success isn’t about innate ability but about character skills like grit, curiosity, and determination. He emphasises that potential is dynamic—people develop at different rates and what matters is trajectory, not starting point.

    What makes it special: Grant challenges meritocracy myths with compelling research. He shows how biased systems hide potential. The right environments can reveal greatness in unexpected places. It’s both inspiring and actionable.

    Perfect for: Teachers, coaches, leaders, and parents who want to unlock growth in others. It’s also suitable for anyone who has been underestimated or who underestimates themselves. Additionally, it’s ideal for fans of books like Grit, Mindset, or Atomic Habits who are looking for science-based, optimistic personal development guidance.

    Key takeaway: Embrace strategic discomfort as a growth zone. Progress comes from stretching just beyond your current limits, not from repeating what’s easy.

    54. Predictably Irrational: The Hidden Forces That Shape Our Decisions by Dan Ariely

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.12/5

    Ariely reveals the hidden psychological forces that drive our choices. We compare relatively rather than absolutely, overvalue free things, procrastinate on good intentions, and let emotions hijack rational thought.

    What makes it special: Through clever experiments that are both entertaining and enlightening, Ariely makes behavioural economics accessible and fun. The book reads like a detective story, uncovering the surprising patterns behind our seemingly random decisions.

    Perfect for: Anyone interested in behavioural economics, psychology, or marketing. This includes people who want to understand why we make irrational choices and how to outsmart our own biases. It is also for fans of Malcolm Gladwell, Thinking, Fast and Slow, or Nudge.

    Key takeaway: Awareness of our biases allows us to make better decisions. Plan ahead while in a “cold” emotional state to counter the effects of “hot” emotional decisions.

    53. Captivate: The Science of Succeeding with People by Vanessa Van Edwards

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.12/5

    Van Edwards breaks down social interaction into three levels: first impressions, personalisation, and deep connection. She reveals that the most respected people are both high-warmth (friendly, empathetic) and high-competence (confident, skilled).

    What makes it special: Van Edwards combines rigorous research with practical techniques. She turns the art of charisma into a learnable science. Her approach demystifies social skills for introverts and gives even socially confident people specific tools for deeper connections.

    Perfect for: Professionals, leaders, and entrepreneurs who want to improve networking and people skills. Introverts who want a science-based approach to social confidence could also benefit. It is for anyone interested in nonverbal communication, charisma, and influence.

    Key takeaway: The first few seconds matter enormously. Use intentional body language, ask engaging questions beyond small talk, and focus on making others feel valued.

    52. Sum: Forty Tales from the Afterlives by David Eagleman

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.12/5

    Through creative tales of possible afterlives, Eagleman explores identity, meaning, and what makes life worth living. These thought experiments reveal our deep desire for purpose and connection.

    What makes it special: This isn’t philosophy or religion—it’s imaginative fiction that makes you think deeply about existence. Each micro-story is a philosophical puzzle that reframes how you see life, death, identity, and meaning in completely unexpected ways.

    Perfect for: Thinkers, dreamers, and sceptics who enjoy existential fiction or philosophical musing. It’s also for fans of Black Mirror, Jorge Luis Borges, or Ted Chiang. Additionally, it suits anyone interested in death, meaning, consciousness, or what makes a life worth living.

    Key takeaway: We are not one fixed person but many versions of ourselves. The limits and struggles of life often give it depth and meaning—perfection isn’t what we think it is.

    51. The Power of Moments: Why Certain Experiences Have Extraordinary Impact by Chip Heath and Dan Heath

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.12/5

    Chip and Dan Heath identify four elements that make moments memorable. The first is elevation, which means rising above routine. The second is insight, which involves re-framing our understanding. The third is pride, capturing people at their best. The fourth is connection, deepening ties with others.

    What makes it special: This book provides a practical blueprint. It helps you engineer peak experiences rather than leaving them to chance. The Heaths research-backed framework applies whether you’re designing customer experiences, teaching students, or creating family memories.

    Perfect for: Leaders, educators, therapists, coaches, and customer experience designers who aim to create meaningful, lasting experiences. Anyone who wants to make life more memorable and emotionally resonant for themselves and others could benefit. It is also ideal for fans of Made to Stick or Drive who enjoy actionable insights grounded in psychology.

    Key takeaway: People remember peaks and endings more than duration. You can intentionally design meaningful moments rather than waiting for them to happen naturally.

    These ten books share several powerful themes:

    • Growth is possible at any stage – Whether it’s developing a growth mindset, building emotional intelligence, or recognising hidden potential
    • Relationships are central to fulfillment – From deep listening to building trust to creating shared moments
    • Self-awareness enables better living – Understanding our biases, emotions, and patterns helps us make better choices
    • Small actions compound into significant change – Whether it’s micro-moments of attention or daily efforts toward goals

    The path to a more fulfilling life isn’t about perfection. It’s about growth and connection. It requires the courage to keep learning about ourselves and others.

    Stay tuned for the next books in the countdown…

    Dr Damon Ashworth

    Clinical Psychologist

  • Part Four of My Top 100 Non Fiction Books Countdown: 70-61

    Part Four of My Top 100 Non Fiction Books Countdown: 70-61

    Here are the next ten books in my top 100 non-fiction books countdown. I have read all of these over the last nine years.

    These ten titles cover a wide range of topics. Including creativity and flow, effortless achievement, system optimisation and authentic confidence. They also cover identity and healing, longevity and resilience, and prediction and human potential.

    Feel free to check out the prior parts of the countdown first if you haven’t yet: 100-91, 90-81, and 80-71.

    Here’s 70 to 61.

    70. The Creative Act: A Way of Being by Rick Rubin

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.01/5

    Legendary music producer Rick Rubin presents creativity as a way of being, not just making art. He emphasises organic, non-linear creative processes that need patience, trust, and surrender to uncertainty rather than forcing outcomes.

    What makes it special: It treats creativity as accessible to everyone. The focus is on mindset and presence over technical skills. It incorporates wisdom from decades of working with top artists.

    Perfect for: Artists, musicians, creatives of all kinds, anyone feeling blocked, and people interested in mindfulness and personal growth.

    Key takeaway: Creativity is not a talent reserved for artists. It is a natural way of being accessible to everyone. It emerges organically when you approach life with openness, presence, and trust in the process. Do not force outcomes or seek external validation.

    69. Effortless: Make It Easier to Do What Matters Most by Greg McKeown

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.04/5

    McKeown shows how to make success feel natural and sustainable by working smarter, not harder. He advocates for simplifying complex tasks, building routines that need less willpower, and aligning work with natural energy rhythms.

    What makes it special: It challenges the “hard work equals success” myth. The book offers practical strategies. These strategies reduce friction and psychological burden while achieving better results.

    Perfect for: Busy professionals, perfectionists, overachievers, and anyone struggling with motivation or seeking work-life balance.

    Key takeaway: “Effortless” doesn’t mean lazy or without any work at all. Instead, it’s about being strategic in how you apply your energy so you can sustain high performance without burning out. Stop glorifying struggle and instead ask: “What if this could be easy?” This mindset shift helps you find simpler, more sustainable ways to achieve what truly matters.

    68. The Checklist Manifesto: How to Get Things Right by Atul Gawande

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.04/5

    Gawande reveals how simple checklists dramatically improve performance in complex, high-stakes situations. From operating rooms to cockpits, he shows how checklists manage cognitive load and prevent critical errors.

    What makes it special: This demonstrates how basic tools can profoundly impact safety and quality. It includes compelling real-world examples from medicine and aviation.

    Perfect for: Healthcare professionals, managers, project teams, entrepreneurs, and anyone in high-stakes fields where mistakes have serious consequences.

    Key takeaway: Using checklists can dramatically reduce errors and improve performance, even among highly skilled professionals dealing with complex tasks. In our complex world, we need to embrace tools that help us manage complexity. We can’t pretend to handle everything through individual brilliance alone. Checklists represent a simple but powerful way to improve reliability and save lives across many fields.

    67. The Confidence Gap: From Fear to Freedom by Russ Harris

    Goodreads star rating = 4.05/5

    Harris argues that real confidence comes from taking action despite fear, not from feeling fearless. Using acceptance and commitment therapy principles, he shows how to build confidence through values-driven action and self-compassion.

    What makes it special: It reframes confidence as a skill you can develop rather than a fixed trait. It emphasises mindfulness and acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT) skills for helping people to become more confident in their lives.

    Perfect for: People who avoid action due to fear, professionals with imposter syndrome, and anyone dealing with anxiety or perfectionism.

    Key takeaway: Waiting to feel confident before taking action is a trap. This trap prevents us from living the life we want. Stop waiting for confidence to show up and start taking small, values-driven actions. Confidence often follows action, not the other way around.

    66. The Velvet Rage: Overcoming the Pain of Growing Up Gay in a Straight Man’s World by Alan Downs

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.06/5

    Downs explores the hidden shame many gay men carry from growing up in a hetero-normative world. This shame drives compensatory behaviours like perfectionism and achievement-seeking. He offers a path toward authentic self-acceptance.

    What makes it special: It offers an honest, compassionate examination of internalised shame and its effects. It also provides practical guidance for healing and building genuine self-worth.

    Perfect for: Gay men struggling with shame. Mental health professionals and LGBTQIA+ allies will find it beneficial. It’s also suitable for anyone on a journey of personal growth and authenticity.

    Key takeaway: Many gay men experience a deep psychological wound. It is often hidden. This wound comes from growing up in a hetero-normative society. The society teaches them that their authentic selves are unacceptable. This leads to lifelong patterns of shame, perfectionism, and emotional numbing. Healing requires recognising these patterns. It involves understanding their origins. The process includes doing the difficult work of building genuine self-acceptance. This is instead of continuing to seek validation through external achievements or approval from others.

    65. The Identity Trap: A Story of Ideas and Power in Our Time by Yascha Mounk

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.06/5

    Mounk examines how politics has shifted from class-based to identity-based divisions. He explores the paradox between celebrating individualism and grouping people into fixed identity categories. He argues for balancing identity affirmation with social cohesion.

    What makes it special: Thoughtful analysis of contemporary political and social dynamics. It avoids partisan talking points. It addresses real challenges of identity politics.

    Perfect for: Students of politics and sociology, policymakers, activists, journalists, and general readers curious about culture wars and social fragmentation.

    Key takeaway: Well-intentioned identity-focused approaches to social justice have become counterproductive. They create political and personal traps. These traps ultimately undermine the goal of achieving equality and justice. The path to justice lies not in abandoning liberal democratic principles. It lies in more fully realising them. We should keep free speech, individual dignity, and cross-cultural exchange.

    64. Waking the Tiger: Healing Trauma by Peter A. Levine and Ann Frederick

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.07/5

    Levine presents trauma as trapped energy in the body rather than just a mental condition. He shows how somatic approaches can help finish interrupted fight, flight, or freeze responses, allowing natural healing to occur.

    What makes it special: This approach to trauma healing is revolutionary. It engages the body’s wisdom. It offers hope for those whom traditional talk therapy hasn’t fully helped.

    Perfect for: Trauma survivors and therapists. It also suits people who do bodywork. Anyone interested in the mind-body connection could find it useful.

    Key takeaway: Trauma is fundamentally a physiological disorder, not just a psychological one. Healing occurs through the body’s natural ability to finish its interrupted stress response rather than through talking therapy alone. Healing trauma requires working with the body’s wisdom. It is important to complete the natural stress cycle, which Levine says was interrupted during the original traumatic event.

    63. The Blue Zones: Lessons for Living Longer From the People Who’ve Lived the Longest by Dan Buettner

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.07/5

    Buettner identifies regions where people live exceptionally long, healthy lives. He reveals their common practices, including natural movement and a sense of purpose. Other practices are stress management and plant-based diets. They also include moderate alcohol consumption, strong communities, family priority, and spiritual engagement.

    What makes it special: Evidence-based longevity secrets from real-world populations, offering practical lifestyle guidance backed by demographic research.

    Perfect for: Health enthusiasts, caregivers, families, community leaders, public health professionals, and anyone interested in ageing well.

    Key takeaway: The world’s longest-lived populations share specific lifestyle patterns. Anyone can adopt these patterns to increase their lifespan. These habits can also improve their quality of life. Longevity isn’t primarily about genetics. Genetics accounts for only about 20% of lifespan. It’s about creating an environment and lifestyle that naturally promotes health and longevity.

    62. Superforecasting: The Art and Science of Prediction by Phillip E. Tetlock and Dan Gardner

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.08/5

    Tetlock reveals what makes some people exceptionally good at predicting future events. Superforecasters are curious, open-minded, think in probabilities, regularly update their views, and break complex problems into manageable parts.

    What makes it special: It shows that forecasting is a learnable skill. It is not an innate talent. The book offers practical techniques for improving prediction accuracy in any field.

    Perfect for: Strategy professionals, data scientists, critical thinkers, teams making decisions under uncertainty, and students of psychology or economics.

    Key takeaway: Some people are remarkably better at predicting future events than others. These superforecasters use specific thinking techniques. These techniques can be learned and applied by anyone to make better predictions and decisions. In an uncertain world, we can still make significantly better predictions by adopting the disciplined thinking habits of superforecasters.

    61. What Doesn’t Kill Us: How Freezing Water, Extreme Altitude, and Environmental Conditioning Will Renew Our Lost Evolutionary Strength by Scott Carney

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.09/5

    Carney explores how modern comfort has weakened our evolutionary resilience and how we can reclaim ancient abilities through environmental conditioning. He investigates cold exposure, breathwork, and extreme challenges that build physiological and mental strength.

    What makes it special: This is a science-backed exploration of human potential. It challenges assumptions about our physical and mental limits. It includes practical applications for building resilience.

    Perfect for: Biohackers, health optimisers, adventure seekers, wellness practitioners, and fans of self-experimentation backed by research.

    Key takeaway: Modern humans have become dangerously disconnected from environmental stressors. Our bodies evolved to handle these stressors. Deliberately reintroducing controlled stressors, particularly cold exposure, can dramatically improve our health, resilience, and performance. Avoiding all stress and discomfort doesn’t make us healthier – it makes us fragile.

    Stay tuned for books 60-51 next week…

    Dr Damon Ashworth

    Clinical Psychologist

  • Top 100 Non-Fiction Books Countdown: 80-71

    Top 100 Non-Fiction Books Countdown: 80-71

    This is the third part in my top 100 non-fiction books countdown. Feel free to check out part one and part two if you haven’t yet.

    Hopefully they can give you some good ideas if you are looking for a good non-fiction book to check out.

    All books have been personally read over the past eight years. Here’s books 80 to 71…

    80. So You’ve Been Publicly Shamed by Jon Ronson

    Goodreads.com star rating = 3.93/5

    Ronson explores how online mobs can destroy lives over mistakes or misunderstandings, revealing the dark side of digital justice. He shows how social media amplifies traditional shaming exponentially, often without due process or path to redemption.

    What makes it special: It is a compassionate examination of modern mob justice. It balances accountability with mercy. It highlights the lasting psychological harm of viral shaming.

    Perfect for: Anyone navigating social media, psychologists studying modern social dynamics, and readers interested in technology’s impact on human behaviour.

    Key takeaway: While the internet was supposed to democratize voice and justice, it has failed in this mission. It has created a new form of mob justice. This new form often lacks mercy, proportionality, or the possibility of redemption.

    79. This Is Marketing: You Can’t Be Seen Until You Learn to See by Seth Godin

    Goodreads.com star rating = 3.93/5

    Godin reframes marketing as creating meaningful change rather than just selling. He emphasizes serving your smallest viable audience, building trust through empathy, and telling authentic stories that resonate with people’s values.

    What makes it special: Ethical marketing treats customers as humans. It does not view them as targets. This approach focuses on long-term relationship building over quick wins.

    Perfect for: Entrepreneurs, small business owners, creatives, and anyone interested in how psychology shapes buying decisions.

    Key takeaway: Marketing has evolved from a game of attention-grabbing. It is now a practice of building trust. It focuses on creating value and serving communities of people who share common values and aspirations.

    78. From Strength to Strength: Finding Success, Happiness and Deep Purpose in the Second Half of Life by Arthur C Brooks

    Goodreads.com star rating = 3.94/5

    Brooks explores how success evolves from fluid intelligence (quick thinking) in youth to crystallized intelligence (wisdom) in later life. He shows how embracing this transition leads to deeper fulfillment through relationships, mentorship, and purpose.

    What makes it special: A hopeful guide to thriving beyond traditional career achievements. It emphasizes the “second curve” of life focused on meaning over status.

    Perfect for: Midlife adults navigating transitions, professionals facing burnout, and anyone redefining success beyond achievements.

    Key takeaway: The second half of life can be the most fulfilling. This is possible if we’re willing to redefine success. We should embrace our changing strengths. It’s important to focus on contribution over achievement.

    77. The Courage to Be Disliked by Fumitake Koga and Ichiro Kishimi

    Goodreads.com star rating = 3.94/5

    This dialogue-style book is based on Adlerian psychology. It argues that happiness comes from choosing your own life. It suggests you find happiness rather than being controlled by past experiences. It emphasises taking responsibility, separating your tasks from others’, and having the courage to live authentically.

    What makes it special: A philosophical approach to self-help that challenges victim mentality while promoting personal responsibility and authentic living.

    Perfect for: People seeking freedom from past burdens, those interested in philosophical psychology, and readers wanting practical wisdom about relationships.

    Key takeaway: Happiness and freedom come from taking responsibility for your own life. Avoid taking responsibility for others’ lives. Have the courage to live authentically, regardless of others’ approval.

    76. The Artist’s Way: A Spiritual Path to Higher Creativity by Julia Cameron

    Goodreads.com star rating = 3.95/5

    Cameron presents creativity as a spiritual practice, introducing tools like Morning Pages (stream-of-consciousness writing) and Artist Dates (solo creative outings). She helps readers recover from creative blocks and criticism to reconnect with their artistic selves.

    What makes it special: It offers a secular yet spiritual approach to creativity. This approach treats artistic expression as essential to human well-being. It is not just a professional pursuit.

    Perfect for: Anyone feeling creatively blocked, artists struggling with perfectionism, and people seeking to reconnect with play and purpose.

    Key takeaway: Everyone is creative by birthright. However, most people have been disconnected from this creativity through criticism, practicality, or neglect. Through consistent spiritual and creative practices, anyone can recover their creative voice and live a more authentic, fulfilling life.

    75. The Rational Optimist: How Prosperity Evolves by Matt Ridley

    Goodreads.com star rating = 3.97/5

    Ridley argues that human progress is real and accelerating, driven by exchange and specialization. He challenges pessimistic narratives by showing how trade, innovation, and human cooperation have consistently improved living standards throughout history.

    What makes it special: Evidence-based optimism that counters doomsday thinking while acknowledging real problems, emphasizing human ingenuity and market solutions.

    Perfect for: Sceptics of progress, economists, entrepreneurs, and anyone overwhelmed by negative media coverage who wants a data-driven counter-narrative.

    Key takeaway: Human progress is not accidental but stems from our unique capacity for exchange and specialisation. We must maintain free trade and open communication for things to keep improving. If we do so, the future will be better than the past. This improvement will occur not despite problems, but because problems create opportunities for innovation and improvement.

    74. Bittersweet: How Sorrow and Longing Make Us Whole by Susan Cain

    Goodreads.com star rating = 3.97/5

    Cain explores how sorrow and longing contribute to human wholeness, challenging Western culture’s obsession with positivity. She shows how embracing the bittersweet in life—the mix of joy and sadness—leads to deeper creativity, connection, and meaning.

    What makes it special: It beautifully defends emotional depth. It validates melancholy and sensitivity as sources of strength. These are seen as strengths rather than weaknesses.

    Perfect for: Sensitive people who feel “too emotional.” It’s great for creatives drawing from personal struggles. Anyone grieving will find it helpful. Those sceptical of toxic positivity will also benefit.

    Key takeaway: Life’s most profound experiences and greatest achievements often come from our capacity to feel deeply. We must embrace complexity and transform our longing and pain into something meaningful and beautiful. The goal isn’t constant happiness but rather a rich, authentic engagement with the full spectrum of human experience.

    73. Talking to Strangers: What We Should Know About the People We Don’t Know by Malcolm Gladwell

    Goodreads.com star rating = 3.99/5

    Gladwell reveals why we’re bad at understanding people we don’t know. He explores our “default to truth” bias and the myth of transparency. Through cases like Sandra Bland and Amanda Knox, he shows how misreading strangers can have tragic consequences.

    What makes it special: It challenges assumptions about reading people. It emphasizes the importance of context over character judgments. This has profound implications for law enforcement and cross-cultural communication.

    Perfect for: Psychology enthusiasts, professionals in law enforcement or criminal justice, people working across cultures, and fans of true crime.

    Key takeaway: Our evolved psychological mechanisms for dealing with strangers are poorly adapted to modern life. As a result, we systematically misunderstand others. Recognising these limitations can help us make better decisions and avoid tragic mistakes when encountering people we don’t know.

    72. At Home: A Short History of Private Life by Bill Bryson

    Goodreads.com star rating = 3.99/5

    Bryson takes readers on a room-by-room journey through domestic life, revealing the extraordinary histories behind ordinary things. He examines everything from beds to salt to staircases. He shows how our homes reflect broader social, technological, and economic changes throughout history. This is all delivered with his signature wit and humour.

    What makes it special: It makes history accessible and entertaining by focusing on the familiar. It reveals how recent many “basic” comforts really are. Bryson’s engaging, ironic tone transforms learning about mundane topics like dust, sewage, and wallpaper into an oddly addictive experience.

    Perfect for: Curious learners who enjoy witty nonfiction. History buffs interested in domestic life. Teachers and trivia fans seeking memorable anecdotes. Anyone renovating or obsessed with homes who wants historical context for their spaces.

    Key takeaway: We take for granted the comfort and privacy in modern homes. These conveniences are incredibly recent innovations. For most of human history, even the wealthy lived in conditions we’d consider uncomfortable, unsafe, and unsanitary.

    71. The Year I Met My Brain: A Travel Companion for Adults Who Have Just Found Out They Have ADHD by Matilda Boseley

    Goodreads.com star rating = 4.00/5

    Boseley’s memoir explores adult ADHD diagnosis, particularly in high-functioning women who often mask their struggles. She shows how getting diagnosed provided relief and self-understanding rather than defeat, challenging stereotypes about neurodivergence.

    What makes it special: It provides an honest and relatable account of late ADHD diagnosis. This reduces stigma and offers hope for adults who’ve struggled with shame and self-criticism.

    Perfect for: Adults suspecting they have ADHD, recently diagnosed individuals, high-achievers feeling perpetually unsettled, and mental health professionals.

    Key takeaway: Receiving an adult ADHD diagnosis can be overwhelming and life-changing. However, with research, understanding, and practical strategies, it can also be empowering. It can lead to better self-awareness and life management. The book combines personal experience with practical advice for others on similar journeys.

    Stay tuned for the next installment in the countdown next week…

    Dr Damon Ashworth

    Clinical Psychologist